Looking Through The Window

I didn't want you, i needed you. But you left anyway.

I just thought i'd let you all know before you read this chapted i added a little more to the last one, so if you read that you will get this chapter a little more,...ITS A LONG ONE GUYS!!!!!

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I was well and truly falling for Carston, i knew that but my mother bringing up Jared brought back a lot of memories. Memories i wish i could forget. I must've been mad going back to Pheonix. But i had to see Lee, i had to visit Alexs' parents and attend her funeral. I hated that it was mostly my fault it took so long for the funeral to take place. I really didn't want to see the sea take Alexs' to different place in ash form, but it's what she wanted. She considered it as her freedom and in a way it was. 

Packing was so hard, i promised Lee i'd get her a small gift for when i visited and i barely had time to shop. My mum said she'd take me into the town square after she had finished painting her bedroom. 

Things were coming along, slowly, but it was coming along. I finished packing and went into my mums room. She had the room at the end of the hall, it was a three bedroomed house and it was a traditional American terrace house. My heart was warming to it really.

I walked into my mums room and the dingy green carpet had been replaced with a really nice aqua blue and the plaster walls had now been painted a very light brown. She had a knapt for decorating. I always told her if she didnt make it as a teacher she could definitely score a spot on 60 minute makeover.

''Mum are you done? i want to be there before tea, her mums making us spaghetti and it's 10am already.'' I explained

''Oh yes sweetie, i'll be down in the kitchen in 5 minutes, just finishing this corner. Theres Krispy Kreme doughnuts in the fridge, help yourself.'' 

''Thanks mum! but i think i'll wait, not really hungry.''

''Okay sweetie. Are you not going to say goodbye to Carston?'' She asked a relevant question, i made Carston leave early morning yesterday and i wasn't returning he's calls. I had reasons and they all pointed back to one person...Jared. Great i was locked between a human and a vampire, In all points he didn't seem like a vampire. More human, which made me incredibly happy.

I walked into the kitchen and picked up an apple instead. It was really juice i could tell my mum had just bought them. Wow it was tasty, i was just at the core when my mum came downstairs looking around the kitchen.

I knew what she was looking for, i pointed to her car keys and she came up to me and kissed my forehead stroking my blonde curls.

''Where would i be without you?'' She asked. I just smiled and made my way out onto the drive.

I got into the car and put on my seatbelt, and turned on Kerrang radio. Asking Alexandria-Not The American Average flooded the car and as my mum got in she groaned. 

Okay so me and my mum have never had the same taste in music. She was really into Rihanna and Beyonce and well i hated both of them. Like reall bad.

The drive was really confusing, we were contantly inbetween stations and she even had me listening to Jason Derulo at one point. Thats love that is.

We parked in the town parking lot and made our way to the main furniture shop. It was a beautiful store, smaller than the ones in Pheonix but it had so much more to it really. It was such beautiful furniture and i was looking for something specific, a picture frame maybe? Something small but still shown my love towards Lee and of course i was going to go to the garden isle and find a nice stone for Alex, i was going to bury it with her. She loved stones. 

My mum went looking for house furniture and i went to look at the picture frames. There was so many kinds, so many shapes, it was so hard to choose. I knew which colour though, green..Lee loved the colour green, it ws her favorite.