You're crashing but you're no wave

Living nightmare

Hands pushed me against the wall and dragged my wrists above my head. Olive skin pushed against mine. His lips drew closer to mine and adrenaline flooded through my body. I was lifted from my feet and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He layed me down on the couch and started kissing my neck. I moaned lightly and he took my shirt off of me.

He pulled back to take his shirt off himself and I admired his figure. Tanned and ever so slightly muscular. Nothing like mine. I looked up to his face but then... blood. It was covered in blood. Not just dried blood, it dripped down and landed on my chest. I tried to move back but then saw a pointy object. He lifted it high above his head and dropped it down.

I sat up so quick I nearly fell out of bed. It was half past two in the morning and I had to open the window to cool down. The plastic creaked against itself and I heard something from elsewhere in the apartment. I pressed the button that illuminated my apartment and rubbed my eyes. The front door wasn't open and neither were any of the windows. I checked my phone that was on the coffee table for anything that could explain the noise.

"You?" A voice questioned from behind me. I spun round and fell back on the table at the sight before me. "Of all people, you?"

"Pete!" I tried to scramble for my phone that had fallen on the floor but he grabbed my wrists and pinned them above my head on the table.

"Why!" He yelled, his face so close his tears fell straight onto my face.

"Pete I-"

"WHY ARE YOU MESSING WITH MY HEAD LIKE THIS!" He was becoming hysterical and his grip loosened. His head fell onto my chest and I wrapped my arms around his back, holding him tight against me in the most comforting way I could think of. He gripped my pyjamas and stopped holding back. He cried for half an hour lying over me whilst I just rubbed his back.

"Why?" He asked in a scared voice.

"It's a long story..."

"I deserve to know."

"You do and that's why I'm going to tell you. I was just warning you. But how about we lie somewhere more comfortable than a mahogany wood table." Once on the couch we resumed our position and I began to try and explain some of it. "Pete I bailed you out because you're still a child, yet there's no way you can get away with what you've done. But that doesn't mean that whatever time you have left of your life, you don't deserve."

"So you bailed me out?"

"Yes..."

"But then what? Cuz the thing that fucks with my head the most is how you speak in court, how you fight against me... Yet how you look at me... How you cry..."

"Pete, for one thing I am very tired, so I can't tell you everything as of this second. We'll talk tomorrow. Then I'll ask how you got here and so on but first why aren't you at home."

"She wouldn't take me in..." I rubbed his back again.

"Well you are at least staying here until tomorrow so we can talk.. The only thing I'll tell you now is I don't want my job... I don't want to be against you... I don't want you hurt..." And I fell into sleep without another word.

Pete sat at my breakfast bar with his head in his hands and smudged eyeliner. I looked at him lightly over my shoulder and smiled slightly.

"I may not be the best cook but at least it's better than whatever you've been eating in that cell."

"Thank you..." He sounded tired, understandably. I placed the pancakes in front of him and smiled warmly. He looked up and attempted to smile. I don't think he had done that in a while and I suddenly found myself absorbed in his homely brown eyes. The hatred they held yesterday, gone.

"Patrick tell me what's been going on for you... Please. I'm so confused."

"Pete you're a child... I don't think you deserve to suffer more than you have to."

"Thank you but please don't call me a child."

"Okay."

"If you're trying to be nice then, first off explain the news articles. I read it this morning on your table."

"The press are terrible. The amount of money they offered me to make the headline seem bad was astonishing."

"So you make me seem bad just to get more money than you need?" He sounded harsher but I was quick to make things clear.

"No Pete, please, all that money went to bailing you out. That's the only reason I did it." He looked less angry and looked back at his food. "Now you tell me how you found me."

"Old friends... I have some good connections. One of them found the records for people bailed and they found your address. obviously I went to my Mom's first thinking it was her but... She hit me and said some pretty harsh stuff..."

"Pete..." I stroked the side of his head and he didn't move away and I was glad so I moved a little closer.

"I wanted to come see who had bailed me out to see if I could stay with them. Now it's your turn to explain yourself in court yesterday. And about how if you don't want your job why you're there working against me despite everything you say." I sighed not looking forward to this part.

"I failed a lot of cases. Innocent men have been killed because I fucked up. I've been issued a final warning. If I fuck up one more case in any way, give false evidence, deny a case, drop out... I get life in jail and everything I know destroyed..."

"The fuck?! Oh no Patrick..."

"I have to act like I'm doing my job when I'm dying inside..." He dragged me into his arms and I pushed my face into his neck.

"I have to admit, I saw you run out crying yesterday. It's just all been confusing standing on the over side of the glass. Only getting to admire you from afar not know you..." I was crying lightly and now wasn't the time to analyse what he had said. Besides I was to distracted by that smell... That natural scent that smelt so good.

"At least there's no court today seeing as Frank and Gerard have to be questioned..." Pete grew pale once again at the mention of the case. I on the other hand had calmed down quite a bit. "Come on let's watch a movie." I grabbed his hand, fingers interlocking and pulled him down onto the sofa, turning on the TV. I didn't bother to remove my hand and neither did he but instead he rested his head on my shoulder. I had only really known his for twelve hours. But I'd give this case about a week till it closes and I've got a horrible feeling that I won't ever see Pete again after all this. With only a week to know Pete, it's pointless worrying about anything moving too quickly or us rushing or anything like that because Pete's life is fleeting.

I put a film on and rested my head on Pete's.

"Ya' know, you never answered why this is your job if you don't like it."

"Well let's just say I wasn't so much my Mother's son as puppet."

"She forced you?"

"Mmhmm." I hummed trying not to focus on my mother so much I got upset.

"Well then where is she now?"

"Dead." I replied like it was no big deal.

"Oh Patrick I'm-"

"No no, don't. It means nothing to me..." He was quiet for a while then spoke up again.

"Patrick did she ever hurt you?"

"A little yeah..." My tone wasn't all too serious implying it was far more than a little, which it was.

"Is this conversation upsetting you?"

"A little yeah." I chuckled slightly, still not trying to take the conversation too seriously through fear of remembering my childhood.

"One more question?" I looked at him expectantly, "Why are you still doing it if she's not here?"

"Contract."

"Oh, you'll be free of it some day don't worry..." He settled down again, snuggling into me. If things keep going in this direction that'll be sooner than you think...