My eyes flutter open and a sense of sickness falls over me. My body is numb and shaking violently. Then I remember the pain killers and I feel that they may be working.
PJ steps into the room I have been sleeping in and a sharp pain puts itself into my stomach and I cry out.
"Dude what's wrong man?" He asks quickly running to my side.
I can't speak.
"MOM!! WE NEED TO GET DAN TO THE HOSPITAL SOMETHING IS WRONG!"
I hear her race up the stairs.
"Oh no what happened?"
I see tears fill his eyes "I-I don't know but we need to get him to the ER and fast"
I feel them grabbing me and I can tell that PJ is the one holding me because of his strong arms. Then i feel a sharp pain in my head and i scream.That is when I black out.
My eyes slowly open and I hear a machine beeping in my left ear. I look up at it and I see a little moving line which must be my heart beat and it is slow. I feel a sharp pain in my head and I try to move my limbs but my body is so numb I can't tell if I am actually moving. It feels like when you lay on your foot wrong all night and can't feel it except it is my entire body.
The door opens and a man in a white coat comes over next to me.
"You are very sick young man I don't know why you decided to take all of those pain killers but you almost died."
I smile weakly "That was the point doctor the thing is I want to die so do you mind unplugging those machines for me"
The doctor chuckles a bit "No young man you need to live and you will find a reason to someday you see suicide isn't a way to ensure nothing bad will ever happen again it is a way to ensure that things can never get better."
I laugh "The thing you don't understand is I don't want things to get better"
"Than live"
I think about this and I realize what I said was really shitty. "Okay you got me sir what's wrong with my condition"
He looks me straight in the eyes "Son you don't realize how lucky you are if you would've taken even a half a pill more you would be dead so your condition is pretty bad."
I swallow a lump in my throat "When will I get out and be able to go home?"
"Well we heard you were kicked out of your home and after Mrs.Daughterly found out that you took most of her pain killers we think that it is best that you don't go back there. Plus you have some serious wounds on your arm care to tell me where those are from."
"I did that myself before I took the pills and why would they not want me back"
"It's not that she doesn't want you back we just won't let you go back"
"WELL WHY THE FUCK NOT!"
"Calm down Mr.Howell it is for your own safety we don't want you to hurt yourself anymore"
"WELL I WILL FIND A WAY TO DO IT WHEREVER I AM!"
"It's either adoption or the psych-ward Dan your choice"
I ponder this "Why would anyone want to adopt a suicidal teen."
The doctor smiles at me. "We already have someone in London who will take you"
"YOU WANT ME TO GO TO LONDON AND JUST LEAVE WALES BEHIND!"
"It will be good for you to get away from your other family."
"THAT'S WHERE YOUR WRONG I HAD A FAMILY UNTIL MY DAD MURDERED MY MUM AND MY OLDER BROTHER DECIDED TO KILL HIMSELF WHY CAN YOU LET ME DIE TOO!"
"Because your special"
FLASHBACK:
"Daniel stop doing that"
I jump off of the bed and onto my brother but he catches me and we begin to fall on the floor and giggle.
"David?" I ask.
He smiles "Yes Daniel"
"Why are you always so sad"
He sighs and sits me in his lap.
"Just some things with dad that you wouldn't understand and just feeling lonely"
I giggle "Your not lonely you have me"
My brother laughs "But your only three"
My eyes get teary "But I thought we were friends I thought you loved me."
He picks me up and turns me around "I do love you but I wish I had some people my age"
I hug him "But 8 year olds suck except for you"
4 years later
My dad and David are screaming at each other and I just stand there.
"I HATE YOU DAD I HATE YOU YOU ARE SUCH AN ABUSIVE FUCK!"
My dad holds David's throat but David knees him in the stomach and runs out of the house I follow him.
"DAVID COME BACK PLEASE I LOVE YOU!"
"GO HOME DANIEL!"
"NO!"
I continue to run until we reach a bridge that has no water at the bottom of it and is at least 100 feet off the ground.
I see the tears on my brothers face and he hugs me "Daniel I'm so sorry" he kisses my forehead and stands up and jumps off of the bridge.
"NO DAVID NOOO!!!" I scream as loud as I can.
I look over the railing at the bottom I see my brother laying at the bottom on the concrete below in a pool of blood motionless. My only brother was dead.
PRESENT:
My eyes become foggy at the memory of David and I finally speak.
"Fine i'll go time to get away from this sad town"
"You chose correctly Daniel I'm sure that you will find happiness you leave tomorrow."
THANK YOU GUYS FOR READING CHAPTER TWO JUST ANOTHER THING THE DOCTORS QUOTE ABOUT SUICIDE WAY BY KELLIN QUINN AND NOT MY OWN. I HOPE THAT YOU CONTINUE READING THE STORY I HAVE PUT ALOT OF EFFORT INTO THIS. THANK YOU!
~ScarlettKat🙀
YOU ARE READING
The Fault in Our Scars (Phan AU)
ФанфикDaniel James Howell an abused teenager with a big heart is beaten and thrown out of his house because he is bisexual and his father did not approve of him. He runs to his friend PJs house and finds himself attempting suicide and cutting down to his...
