But I guess I have no valentine.
Sent me roses but I just let them die.
February 14th. Also known as Valentine's Day...
Three months. It's been three months since I left. I've been a wreck , I went back a few times to get some of my stuff and luckily every time I went , Luke wasn't there. He's probably with his new girlfriend.. I tried to contact him to talk about everything , but nowadays he never picks up or answers my texts.
"He's moved on. He never loved you anyways." My thoughts ate me alive.
Today , I would usually be going to a very nice romantic restaurant with Luke. But this year , I'm sitting on my bestfriends couch eating a tub of Ben & Jerry's ice cream and chocolate while watching sappy romance movies , while she's out with her boyfriend.
"Is this what my life has come to? Eating ice cream and getting emotional over stupid movies?" I ask myself.
The doorbell rang and I sighed before getting myself up to answer it.
I swung open the door was quite confused when there was no one there. I looked left and right and I can't see anyone there , either. I looked down to see a huge white rectangular box decorated with pink and red love hearts along the sides with a big red bow on it.
I picked up the box and looked around once more to see if there was anyone who could be responsible, but there was no one. Taking the box inside , I opened it to see a huge bowyer of white and red roses.
"What?" I think to myself .
I took out the flowers and examined them closer. There was at lest 30 roses right there in front of me. I look in the box again and notice an envelope with my name on it. I tear it open eager to see who sent these beautiful flowers and I froze as I saw the handwriting. Luke.
"Hey um yeah I'm sorry. Erm , happy Valentine's Day I guess. I know we aren't technically together or are we? I know you've been back in the house too. I've been staying at Calum's lately. I didn't want to be in the house where all of our memories are , I come home and see more of your things gone and it breaks my heart. I'm sorry I haven't been returning your calls and texts as I decided it would be best to give you the space you wanted. You didn't want to talk to me nor think of everything I've put you through. I'm sorry I'm a shit boyfriend. I'm just so so so so so so sorry for everything that happened , I can't express that enough. I'm sorry I let you walk out , I'm sorry I couldn't grow a pair of balls and fucking tell you. I know you knew I was cheating. I'm sorry I didn't stop , I honestly don't know why I didn't. The first time was a mistake , we were on tour and we went out. I got completely shitfaced and I was missing you too much. But I know that's not an excuse , the boys were beyond pissed with me , after I left her place I knew it was wrong. I knew I was hurting you. That's why I didn't tell you , I didn't want to see the pained expression on your fragile face. Keeping it from you only made everything worse and I apologise so so much for that. Every time it happened another piece of my heart broke and it was eating me up on the inside. Listen , these three months have been absolutely hell for me. I told her to leave right after you left , she didn't leave and I started screaming at her to leave and never contact me again , and she did. I don't even know why I did this in the first place nor why I did this to us. Please believe me when I say that I am completely in love with you. I haven't been the same without you. I just haven't been the same Luke ever since you left. I totally understand if you never want to see me again and hate my guts , if you haven't torn this note up or threw the box away , please meet my by the mountain side where the e had our first valentines date. At 9.00 tonight , if you come I'll know we still have hope but if not , I'll understand. I'll always be waiting for you to come home and change your mind. I love you , it hurts because I love you so much. I'm sorry. I'm so , so sorry. Please give me another chance if you can.
Yours truly , Luke
Crying.. I was crying. He still did love me and he didn't go off with her in fact he told her to leave him alone , to contact him again. I' have mixed emotions right now and I'm debating whether I should go or not. Do I give him another chance? I dropped the flowers and letter and ran to the guest bedroom which is for now , my room. I knew what I had to do.
