If There's A Question of My Love ( August Alsina Love Story )

Chapter 7

Note : so sorry for not updating in forever , I promise I'll be updating everyday or every other day😩😘.  Things are going to get so
good I promise . Read this chore and you'll see 😘😘 stay tuned ❤️   

I never would have thought things what have leaded to what they did last night . I really am falling for August and the fact that I can't help it frustrates me the most. It takes so much in me not latch on to him , but I miss the comfort of a man , the touch of a man and just having one. It makes me sick to my stomach because I know Ahmai wouldn't want me moving on .. or would he? I know I've only known August for a little bit of time , but it's just something about him that makes me feel something I've never felt before in quite a long time. Maybe I should give it a chance .. Should I ?

10:30 a.m

I'm letting my mom watch Mai while I take a day to myself . I need some me time , I need to reevaluate this whole situation with August and the best person I can go to is Raschaud. Raschaud and Ahmai were like brothers growing up and always were. Raschaud is basically Mai's uncle . He's played a big role in his life since my baby died . I appreciated it so much , God only knows .

I get up and head to the bathroom to get in the shower . I take a nice hot shower , and then get ready . I brush my teeth and wash my face . I go into my closet to find something to wear , half of this shit I've never worn . I decided on a cute grey dress that I had , just something simple . I got dressed , did my usual makeup routine then I was on my way to lunch with Rashaud .

If anything the best person to go to would be Raschsud . In this predicament he would know Ahmais best interest, and what Ahmai would want me to do. I don't want to move on in my mind , but the little bit of heart that I do have is telling me different . I miss the idea of having a man around , I miss the comfort and the love , and also the affection . I feel so alone , but today hopefully I get the closure that I need.

I walk into Zea's and get a table for two . I'm surprised Raschaud isn't here yet , he's usually always on time . I order me a drink while I wait for him for about fifteen minutes .

"Well hello lovely , haven't heard from you in a while ." Raschaud said

I give him a little hug .

"Well I've been really busy lately with a lot , and so much has been going on . I really didn't know how I should contact you after your little 'moment' the other day." I said as I sipped my drink.

"Well , you gotta understand that all this shit with Ahmai still hurts a nigga. That was my dawg , my brother so if you telling me someone got a lead how u think I'm gonna react Kylie like for real Ky ." With anger in his eyes.

Maybe I should just get right to the point .

"Okay Rashaud , there's another reason that I'm really here.. "

"Ok? So can you tell me ?" he said confused .

"I'm intrested in someone , I know , I know I'm such a bad person for this shit. I can't help is though at all , I'm dealing falling for this August guy and I know damn well Ahmai wouldn't want this to happen but .. I'm .. So .. Confused .." I start to let the tears roll..
"Raschaud I just don't know what to do , or how to feel . Am I wrong ? Please let me know . This shit is really messing with me hard.."

I was breaking down , I couldn't help it at all.

Raschaud comes to my side of the table and holds me .
" Kylie , all Ahmai ever wanted was for you to be happy , that was his main goals in life . He wanted you and Mai to be happy. If this decision is going to make you happy , then Kay you have to fulfill it , because it's only right. Ahmai would understand and support your decision 100% percent . I'm telling you Kay he wouldn't want you to be alone and depressed . You have a whole life ahead of you Kaylon . It's time to be happy again , and experience love ."

In that moment I felt something come over , I got chills down my spine . In that moment I knew that was Ahmai  reassuring me that this decision was okay . So now I know that I can be at peace with this .

I broke down crying in mostly happy tears .

I'm ready to be free , I'm ready to have someone love me the way Ahmai did . I have to stop being scared and let go and let my self be loved again . I think I'm ready for this .

5:00 PM

After lunch , I went get my nails done . I also went to the mall and got my baby some new Jays and some cute clothing . His mommy loves to keep him fresh , also I got his a new Lego play set . I know my baby is going to be so excited . I'm on my way to the grocery store to pick up some things for the house , I'm going to cook something good tonight for myself . I just needed this day to myself to deal with all these emotions and things going through my head . I can honestly say I'm much more happier and at peace . I go to check out , and pull out the 800 dollars August gave me the other night . I'm paying for my groceries and I see August name on a 20 with his number .

My heart started skipping beats as I started thinking of what to do with it. I hurried up and put it back in my purse . I got my groceries , and got in my car . I took the 20 dollar bill out and looked at it , maybe I should invite August to my place for dinner , and apologize for the other night ... Or maybe just have a glass of wine. I don't know , but I definitely need to see him , and be in his presence . He just gives me a feeling that I haven't felt in a long time , and I actually like it . I like it a lot .

8:00 PM

I get finished making me some baked salmon and sautéed spinach and sweet potatoes . I love cooking healthy for myself on days like this , Mai hates vegtables and things of that sort . I saved August number in my phone and I'm debating on texting him to come over . I mean I would love some company right now , I just need to tell him how I feel . Im no where near in love with him but I have to let him know that , I would want to work on being more than just friends with him. I just have too.

Hey August this is Ky.. Can you come over for dinner if you don't mind ? I need to talk to you..

Hopefully he texts me back soo-

Sure my baby , I'll be there just send me your address.

I sent him my address . My heart skipped a few beats I was nervous as fuck . I was beyond nervous , this honestly felt like a date and I haven't been on one with another guy in forever . This shit is real , like I'm starting to realize in this moment that I'm going to let him know how I feel about him , and ya girl starting to have some regrets . Just breathe Kaylon.

I hear a knock at the door .

I put my big girl panties on and go to the door. I take a deep breath then I open it . There's August with flowers in his hands and a sexy grin on his face . Damn he looks so good , I can't help but stare.

" Baybeh you gone let a nigga in or what ?" He said laughing at me.

" I'm sorry , I was just .."

Hey you guys I will start updating every day or every other day I promise!😘😘😘 Chapters will be way longer!