Face Your Past

Chapter 8:

Did you know that the first time I saw you cry it killed me inside? Yet I spent years doing just that. Katherine mentioned you at lunch today and I blew up at her. I actually blew up, in front of the entire school. The world didn't end, she just glared at me. I don't know why I always thought it would be worse than that. I hate her. Did you know that? Im sure you think I love her, that's why I stood by and said nothing. I've never loved her. I've hated her since the first name she called you, how long has that been, forever I'm sure. I'm going to tell you a secret. I was and am an idiot. I thought being close to her that I could protect you. It worked a few times, stopping her plans. I just wanted it to be better for you. I promise you if you ever come back, I'll protect you for real. I will never let her make you feel less than again. I'm so sorry. Blu...I hope you are happy there. I hope that you never feel the way I made you feel again. I will make her pay for taking you away from me. I promise.

         Woah. What did I just read? I wanted to stay and finish this, but I had to get to school and I couldn't take it with me. So I put it in my hiding place and left. I was sitting beside him in class, I wanted to beg him to make me understand. The letter said he had done things to protect me, I needed to know. All of these years I hated him, I still did for abandoning me, but he never really did, did he? Why would he date her if he hated her, and why did he stop? I had been gone, happy away from here, so why had he written to me but not really written to me. His letter read more like a diary, was it ever meant to be sent? If what I had overheard had been true and Katherine had read this letter, she knew he hated her.

I watched him out of the corner of my eye. I flashed back to the kiss. Why was I thinking about that? That drunken kiss. As the day went on, I needed to know. Should I tell him that he kissed me? Being back here left so many emotions I didn't know I had. By lunch I was going mad inside my head. The letter, the kiss, I needed Kyla.

       After school I practically dove into my bedroom to get to the phone. My mom just stared at me like I'd lost my mind.

"Hey girl!"

"Hey Ky, I have so much to tell you, I need your wisdom."

"Damn, that boy is love with you."

"Seriously Ky! I need you to be serious right now!"

"Oh I am. He was your best friend, then he abandoned you and became a brooding asshole. Granted. Who knows why, you gotta finish that letter. Now he's all remorseful and you're all sexyfied, thanks to yours truly."

Ky...." I warned.

"Fine, but he is and if I had to bet on it based on the pictures he has of you. He was in love long before you left."

"Oh stop. You aren't helping."

"Whatever babes, all truth over here. Anyway, was going to surprise you but we are coming for a visit for your birthday!!" She screamed into the phone. What!??

"Seriously? How? And who?" I asked. "Just me, Pen and of course Sean."

"Seriously!?!" I can't wait. I miss you so much.

"Oh same here babes, if I didn't you know I wouldn't be caught dead in that town. I'm New Yorker all the way." She laughed.

------
         My day turned around. My birthday next month could be bearable. My best friends were coming here to visit me. I needed them right now. Especially now. Family dinner was awkward. Why must they force me to sit through mom and dad trying to stand each other? Keeping them separate is better for all of us. I walked outside to get some fresh air and there she was. I almost laughed because she was standing on his porch screaming and begging him to open. Professing her undying love for him. Gross. I just stood there with my arms crossed. When she noticed me she grunted. Well that was sexy. "You!" She yelled coming at me. "You ruin everything! You couldn't stay away could you?! I almost had him back. But nooo... You selfish bitch! I will make you pay for this!" I had, had enough.