Getting to know you.

Getting to know you. = Fauxpunker

Name

Shawn, though to Wattpad, fauxpunker. Faux for short.

Age

27 (for just a bit longer). Not quite as old as some of the other interviews, but I’m starting to get promotional mail for the Wattpad Retirement Community.

Gender

Male. Let’s save us all the trouble of decency laws just take my word for it.

How did you find out about Wattpad?

I used to post on a website called Mibba and saw someone mention it over there.

What is your favourite subject, you like to write about?

I don’ know that I have a favourite subject so much as a favourite method. I like to take things and twist them just a bit. Like I go around and turn pictures so they’re just a little off kilter.

What was the last book you read?

Fistful of Reefer by Wattpad’s own hachebrown. And now I’m back to A Song of Ice and Fire (A Feast for Crows).

Who are your favourite writers on Wattpad?

In no order whatsoever::

TheOrangutan (he’s the one that got me active on here), ArkhamsHorror, AngusEcrivain, Hachebrown, JamesDSwinney, Mera2876, and some dude who took a break from Wattpad and came back and did some interviews...

Okay no that’s the boring stuff out of the way lets have some fun.

If you could have a theme tune following you about what would it be?

If I could pick the one I wanted, it would probably be “This is Crackersoul” by Cracker.

More than likely, “Teen Angst (What the World Needs Now)” also by Cracker is a better fit.

If you had three wishes what would you wish for?

Wow... what can I say here that you can actually print?

 Have you ever worn sandals with socks?  

Nope.

If you could choose to be attacked by a Great white shark or a Lion what would it be?

Great white, hands down. Those teeth are super sharp. At least I’ll die quickly and cleanly. And I can die, uttering “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.”

You get the opportunity to travel anywhere in time, where would you go?

Gallifrey, pre Time War

What is your favourite drink?

Non-alcoholic: Tea, any variety, no sugar

Alcoholic: Bourbon, Woodford Reserve in particular, on the rocks

What is your favourite meal?

If I could go back in time and meet the person that decided to combine potatoes with hot oil.... You know what, that’s where I want to go in time. That moment. So I can shake their hand.

Fav meal, though? Grilled venison, with mashed potatoes and cornbread.

Have you ever stolen anything? I wont pass it onto the police don’t worry.

Never took anything that was missed.

Have you ever worn other gender’s underwear?

I’m not a lumberjack, so... no.

What do you like to do in your spare time, other than writing?

Spare time is something I don’t have much of. Though, reading and video games fill that time when it comes up.

If you could travel to any planet in the system which would it be and why?

Neptune. It seems rather lonely and forgotten about.

Would you climb the highest mountain or dive to the deepest parts of the ocean?

Me and heights don’t get along so well. Ocean it is.

How did you come across my profile page?

Actually, I believe you came across mine. If I remember right, the Orangutan sent you my way because I’d written a zombie story.

What are you going to do after doing this interview?

Hopefully get out of class.

Who is your favourite superhero and why?

I don’t know that I have one. Batman probably takes it because he doesn’t really have powers but still kicks ass.

What you working on right now?

Technically, I suppose, I’m working on a sci-fi story, Ashfall. I’m also working on a notsurewhathegenre is story called Sentenced. I’m very slow at it. But, both these stories are taking up my writing time for now.

Where do you see you’re self in ten years time?

The last time I answered this question, I said six feet underground. It didn’t go over very well. But, I really have no idea.

Is there anything you would like to add?

Yeah. Undiscovered Gems is for promoting the work of others, not your own. Understand that and we’ll get along just fine.

Thanks for your time

When’s the second date?