Choose Between Us.

Chapter 9

I heard her speak those words. "My love, open your eyes. Please." Sebastian added to his unfinished sentence. Kira opened her eyes slowly to reveal more tears flowing down. I handed her a tissue box as she sat up, coughing badly. Sebastian sat next to her and hugged her. "I'm so sorry that I ran away." he said. "Even with the baby that we supposed to take care of." Kira added. Baby? They had a child?

A couple thirty minutes pass. Kira was cuddling with Sebastian on my couch. So were Devon and Yuki, in a more sensual way. I leaned against the wall on the other side of the living room. Everything ached. I've never wanted to return to cutting so bad in my life. Kira was all happy and sweet with him. Devon and Yuki were doing the usual. I was only odd one out that nobody loved. Kira and Sebastian then started to make out. What a disrespect. In my house on my couch. Doing such things.

I left to the bathroom to take a breath. 'It's okay Allen. It doesn't matter anymore. You can be free once these guys leave.' I wondered. My heart started to ache again. The pain flowed throughout my body and through my mind. Without even thinking, I grabbed a knife from the cupboard and brushed it on my wrist and forearm, slowly cutting. I flinched a little but continued. I sat in a corner and continued. I didn't want it to stop. It was like I deserved these little stings of pain.

An hour passed and I was laying on the floor with blood around me. There was blood on me as well. I was panting and struggling to breathe, a blood vessel had almost been cut. I then heard someone open the door and gasp. I was so weak that I couldn't even move. "What the fuck Allen?! Why?!" Kira yelled. She stepped back and started to slide down the wall as she fainted. I could here the faint sounds of Devon, Yuki, and Sebastian rushing to our aid. I had made a huge mistake.

It had been at least five hours since I had opened my eyes after that incident. My heart beat was normal. My breathing was also fine. The only thing that hurt was my feelings. Kira sat on the chair next to me and she looked at me as she heard me groan. I looked at her and smiled. She looked away as if she was mad and I lost the smile. "Why'd you do it?" she asked bluntly. I shrugged and answered, "I'm alone. No one loves me. That's why. So what's the point in living if you can't find love. It's what life was meant for." I explained. She sighed and looked at me with sympathy. "I understand how you feel..." she said.