The 'Short' Story Of The Guy Who Doesn't Exist

Welcome to my mind

Wow, somebody actually opened this book... Oh, but please don't take it like I don't want you here, I'm just surprised you're here at all. You know, most people would consider this an invasion of privacy, barging into their personal thoughts like this! But don't worry, I'm not "most people", so you can stay.
*smiley face*
According to the book, I don't even exist!
*another smiley, but this one looks more like a sarcastic smirk of uncertainty and wit*
(you know what I'm talking about *toungue face*... Okay I'm overusing it now, aren't I... *sarcastic sad face*)

So, welcome ladies and gentlemen, to my mind. The Author calls it his book, but its all in perspective, particularly mine. Who was the genius of the book cover anyway? This is a comedy! Not a sad, depressing story of my life! Did I say I was depressed? I don't think so! *heavy panting*
*clears throat*
Yes, well, let me regain my posture and calm down.
If you want a glimpse into my mind, just imagine that guy you know, but never notice. He's like those extras in movies that play important parts (right?), and try their best to fit into the scene and not screw a thing up for the main actors. Yeah, that's a vague, vague version of me... My life's just one big career as an extra. In my mind, the "Populars" don't even come 10 feet near me. Or at least, that's what I would imagine. I'm not what you would call "outgoing".. It's more like I interact when I want, answer when I have to, and keep my mouth shut the rest of the time. You couldn't imagine how many nominations I've got for "Most well-behaved student" or "Quietest Kid" I've won. Seriously. And its not all that bad. You make friends and they respect you as much as you respect them. It's a rule, a rule that is mainstream yet suttle. The teachers refer to you as an example, and they're not afraid of bragging it to every single stranger that happens to also be an acquaintance of theirs too. Total humiliation.

But I'm getting ahead of myself here. Let me start simple... My name's Guy. Guy Normal. I know what you're thinking, the Author is too lazy to create an interesting name for me but hey, the title of this book is literally "The Guy who doesn't exist". What'd you expect? A guy extravagantly named Maximillian or some weird, ancient and evil name parents choose for their kids like: Ned?! (My apologies Ned, if you're reading this... You're name is great man)
Anyways, I was born in Norman, Oklahoma.. the most normal town in the most normal state in America. I guess you could tell from my name and my unbelievably ironic birthplace that I had a destiny since I came into this world.. A destiny to be someone who was totally ordinary to everybody else. But I mean, who am I kidding? Ordinary is the same as perfect. They're both impossible to reach or achieve, and yet we strive to become either one of them.

Enough of the philosophical stuff though, because that stuff comes later... You were intrigued when you read the title, weren't you? I mean, duh, I do exist, but do I really exist to everybody else? What is existence anyway? Is it being alive, or is it actually living? Whoops, philosophy again.
Maybe I should start with a few main reasons why I don't exist...