Looks Are Deceiving

Chapter 5

Previously...
*Sunday*
Dani: sorry about the status, I didn't know you and Oskar broke up.
Me: Neither did I.

Let's start from Tuesday to find out what lead to this....
*Tuesday*
All was going good so far today. I was happy. It was currently lunch two and Oskar was hugging me from behind. Every now and then he would bury into the crook of my neck and kiss my 'sweet spot'. It was nearing the end of lunch and we all decided that it was about time to start heading into the school. I was about to grab my bag when Oskar stopped me with a hug. His arm went around my waist and he pulled me close. I wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my forehead on his shoulder.
"Amelia?" I looked up at him. "God I want to kiss you right now" he said looking into my eyes. So I leaned up and pressed my lips to his.
The rest of the week was the same sort of thing I guess. He would kiss me whenever I would arrive at school or when I was going to a different class. Sometimes he would even steal kisses whenever I wasnt paying attention. I felt that everything was right. I realised that fairy tales do exist, its just, when you find your prince that you know they exist. But it wasn't to be.

*Sunday morning*
I woke up and grabbed my phone I straight away plugged in my headphones and listened to music, I was so happy that I didn't have school. It was about 9.30 when I got a message from Oskar.
Oskar: morning babe xox
Amelia: morning xoxo
O: Wud
A: nothing much, you? ( I don't like using text language)
O: COD black ops II
A: like normal xo.
O: what's with the sudden grumpiness.
A: not grumpy.
O: bullshit. Don't lie to me Amelia.
A:I'm not... Why do you think that I would love to you??
O: GTG.
He ended the conversation leaving me completely confused. How did he think I was grumpy over that.
At twelveish he texted me back
O: are you still grumpy?
A: I wasn't grumpy in the first place.
O: stop lying to me. You know I hate liars.
A: I'm not lying.
O: I'm sick of this Amelia, one minute your happy and lovely and then the next thing I know your being a bitch and you leave me completely confused with what I have done. I can't understand you and its confusing me. I can't do this anymore.
A: what's that supposed to mean.
I waited for ages but he didn't reply. So I called him. He answered the phone on the fifth ring.
Hello?
Hey its me, what the heck was that, what did I do?
Nothing babe, I'm sorry I'm just having a hard time at home and everything
So, you didn't break up with me?
No, no, no, no, no
Then why didn't you text me back?
I ran out of credit.
Okay, so were still good?
Yeah were good, I got to go, Lukas and Cane are over. Bye babe. Ek is lief vir jou
Bye. Te Amo
I hung up the phone with a breath of relief, I really thought he was going to break up with me.
"A-mae come down stairs please, dinners ready" mum yelled out. I ran down stairs and took in a deep breath mum had made one of my favourite dinners ever. LASANGE. I was happy that she made it because we hadn't eaten if for ages and I nearly forgot what it tasted like.
*2 hours later*
Dani had put a post up on Celestrals (our towns version of Facebook) it said like for a like, dislike, rate and match. I like the post twenty minutes ago and I was messaging Kainda when I got the notification
Amelia
Like: you seem amazing and you have a wonderful personality
Dislike: that we don't hang out a lot
Rate 10000/10
Match: my big bro/your bf Oskar ( you to are weirdly cute)
It was cute so I liked the post. I went back to talking to Kainda when I got a message from Dani
Dani: sorry about the status, I didn't know you and Oskar broke up
Me: neither did i
D: OMG! I am so sorry bub.
I started to cry. WTF, but he said that we didn't. So I screen-shot the message and I sent it to Oskar.
Me: is it true? Did you break up with me????
Oskar: I'm sorry, but I can't handle being your boyfriend, I have trust issues and after everything that has happened in my family, I don't know if I can continue this. I'm sorry Milly.
Me: don't call me that, you don't get to call me that.
I cried for a while before I text mum to come to my room. She arrived a few minutes later and saw me crying.
"Chicky what's wrong?"
"He broke up with me mum... I.. He said... He said he couldn't handle b-being my boyfriend" I said between sobs. Mum wrapped her arms around me and pulled me into her while I sobs and cried for what felt like forever.I don't get it, he told me he loved me so many time he would do anything to make me happy and keep me safe but he goes and does this. What did I do?

The next few days were awkward and I stayed away from him but on the following Thursday I just had to talk to him even if it was over Celestrals.
Me: why?
Oskar:why what?
Me: don't play dumb, why did you break up with me I thought you loved me.
O: I'm sorry. You dont understand. Its complicated.
Me: explain it then I will understand.
O: I said it complicated. Damn it Amelia how is it hard to understand. I just don't like you okay. For fuck sake I wish you would just fucking understand that I don't like you. I never did I lied.
Me: see that wasn't complicated 〒_〒
Me: I can't do this anymore. I can't handle living like this.
O: do you fucking dare Amelia. I will never forgive you if you hurt yourself.
And with that I turned off my phone and ran to the bathroom. I grabbed a razor from the draw and I broke it I took the blades and and I grabbed one. This is stupid Amelia. Why start here, just end it now. My conscience told me. But, if I end it now, then he would hurt himself, he would blame himself and so would my family, and Myra would too, even Kainda would. I can't hurt them like that. I brought the razor to the upper part of my left arm. Here goes everything. I pressed deeply, and slid the blade across my skin..... No going back now bitch.

I'm back.
I'm so so so sorry that I disappeared, I have been busy but good news, I'm getting a laptop soon so it will be easier for RMS to update. YAY. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and the next should be posted in an hour or so.
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Love Nicola_Joan