One and Only (A Nick Jonas Fan Fiction)

Chapter Nine: The Blues

My headphones were blasting randomized music into my ears as my eyes were looking at the six of them talking and laughing.  I had never felt so awkward in my life before.  My knees were pulled to my chest on top of the desk chair.  Nick wasn't even trying to acknowledge me.  His brown eyes were focused on Reagan's.  Her hair was a medium length and she seemed extremely nice and awesome, but now I was the underdog.  The one out of the loop.  Taking in a deep breath, one song ended and another began on my iPod.  Holding in the breath, I heard the beginning of "Just Friends" fill my ears.

Keeping in my breath, I felt my tears begin to well with my tears.  I wanted anything but for me to cry right now.  Nick wasn't mine.  Nor was I his, that was clearly shown.  "I'll be right back.." I muttered softly, my voice cracking as I stood up quickly and exited the small room.  I sprinted towards the nearest bathroom and exhaled all the breath in me.  Tears sprung out and slid down my cheeks as my lip quivered.

My back found the wall of the bathroom and I slid down to the floor.  My silent tears soon became convulsed sobs as I yanked the headphones out of my ears.  I ran my hands through my hair, trying to make my breathing even.  My legs stretched out to let me stand once more and my eyes quickly saw me in the mirror.  My face was flushed, my eyes looked tired and puffy, and all I wanted was to cuddle with a stuffed animal on my bed.

I quickly splashed my face with cold water.  Waiting till my face was back to its normal color, I exited the restroom quietly.  My feet began to lead me back towards the room of terror.  I had to make one more turn around a corner to make it back to the room, but my steps began to slow as I heard voices.  It was Nick and Reagan.

Not understanding anything they said, I heard her giggle and then stop.  I quickly looked around the corner and then I was finally broken.  Nick and Reagan were locking lips, her hands were fisting his brown luscious curls.  This was more than just a peck on the lips.  My eyes watched their small make out for about fifteen seconds.

I couldn't take it anymore.  I turned away from the corner and quietly, but quickly ran to any exit I first saw.  Pushing open a door, I quickly found my way to the tour bus.  I quickly climbed into the bus and saw no one in there.  I walked to my bunk and tiredly laid down.  I pulled my blanket up to my chin and sighed softly.  I didn't even bother to change into my pajamas.  I was so emotionally and physically drained.

As my eyes were beginning to shut, the door to the bus was opened and I heard two voices.  Kevin and Joe.  "Jaz are you in here?!" Joe sounded anxious, terrified almost.  I sat up in my bunk slowly and I walked to the main area.  Their brown eyes looked over to me and their faces went from worried to relieved.

"Don't do that ever again!  You disappeared on us!" Kevin shouted and entrapped me in a hug.  His arms were warm and then I quickly felt Joe's arms around me as well.  My lips curved up ever so slightly and they let go of me.  I sheepishly rubbed my arm and I looked at each of them.

"I'm really beat guys.. I just want to sleep.  This was my first full day of the Jonas experience.  I'll see you guys in the morning okay?" I softly stated as I gave them a weak smile.  The two quickly understood and they gave their million dollar smiles.

"See you in the morning.  Rest up," Joe said and gave me another quick hug.  Kevin nodded and also hugged me.

"Sorry about Nick," he whispered into my ear.  My eyes teared softly and I bit my bottom lip.  I quickly walked back to my bunk and I pulled the blanket back up to my chin.  With all the thoughts running through my mind, I thought sleep would come later in the night, but really, I shut my eyes and darkness filled my mind.  Sleep had never come so easily.

"Jazmin!  Jaz wake up!" Kevin's yelling woke me up.  My body was drenched in my sweat and my cheeks were tear-stained.  "Are you okay?" he asked sitting on my bunk bed.  I looked at Kevin and a surprising sob escaped my lips.

"Don't worry about Nick," he said softly and rubbed my shoulder.

"What makes you think this is about him.." I asked as I took a breath to steady myself.

"You kept muttering his name in your sleep," Kevin said with a slight shrug, "Don't worry, I'll talk to him."  With that, Kevin stood up and he left towards the main area.

I didn't want to hear them talk.  I just wanted to go back to sleep and never wake up.  I was missing my mom at that moment.  If I were at home, she would have a long movie marathon in the living room with me.  She knew exactly what to do to make me feel better.

"Nick's really a nice guy," Joe's voice startled me.  He was laying on his bunk and he gave me his adorable smile.

"Well... since I can remember, all he has done is hurt me.  I like him... a lot, but all he does is hurt me," I said softly.  I could hear Kevin lecturing Nick, asking him what he did to make me so upset.  My eyes then darted to the main area and I saw Nick was heading over.  I still didn't want to upfront things with him.  I quickly stood up and began to head towards the back of the bus where the bathroom was.  Suddenly, the bus went over a big speed bump, setting me off balance and hitting the floor.

"Jaz are you okay?" Nick asked panicked as he ran towards me.  He stuck his hand out so he could help me off the floor.  Instead, I glared at it and pushed myself off the floor, getting myself up on my own.

"I'm just dandy Nick," my voice was chilled with ice as I headed towards the bathroom door.

I tried to move quickly, wanting to shut the door on Nick, but he was quicker, keeping the door open slightly.  I glared intensely at him as his eyes looked into mine.  "Let me explain," he said softly.  A few tears rolled down my cheeks and I quickly wiped them away.

"Nick, there is nothing to explain.  She kissed you and you kissed back, end of story," I said letting go of the door, letting Nick open it all the way.

Nick walked into the bathroom and shut the door.  The two of us were fairly close, being that the bathroom was the tiniest space in the world.  "I didn't kiss her back, Jaz," he said to my grabbing my hand.  I shook my head in disagreement.  I moved my hand before he could reach it.

"My eyes were watching you two swap spit for five minutes Nick!" I screamed as my eyes began to feel the sting of more tears.  "You're lying to me!  Right to my face!" Almost like on command, my tears spilled onto my cheeks.

"I thought you were the one, Nick," I said, "I thought you were the one that would never hurt me.  I guess I was wrong."  I pushed past him and walked out of the bathroom.  I couldn't believe I just told Nick off like that.  I grabbed my notebook from my bag and rolled up back into a ball on my bunk.

The bus ride was awkward the rest of the way to the next venue.  Nick and I were on no speaking terms and Joe and Kevin were trying to help work it all out.  Finally getting the chance to shower and change clothes, I felt my mood begin to lighten up slightly.  Once I was out of the bathroom, no one seemed to be on the bus.  It was quiet, and the bus had made its stop at the next venue in San Diego.

No one was heard until I heard a small noise.  Someone was clearing their throat, as to get my attention.  "Hello?" I asked nervously.  I didn't want to be left alone.  I knew security was right outside, but I wanted to have at least one of the guys with me.  I walked down the small hall towards the main area and there, there my heart was beginning to piece back together.