Not being able to fall asleep with ease
Her mind never stops racing. It's like a playlist set on repeat and no matter how many times she tries to turn it off, it just won't stop. She wants it to stop, but then again, she can't stop smiling because her thoughts are invaded with images of him, their text messages, their face to face conversations, it's him, and sometimes it's them. Them. She loves the sound of that.
Maybe one day he and I could be a we.
She hopes so. It's hard to think of him without smiling, and maybe she doesn't want to fall asleep because then she couldn't think about who they could be, who they are, and maybe who they used to be.
The playlist feels like it's going in fast forward and it's giving her a headache. He gives her a headache because even when she's trying to sleep, trying to eat, intoxicated, or not in her right mind, all her mind can seem to think about is him. Her feelings for him are growing too fast that she can't keep up. It's terrifying.
It's terrifying because when a playlist is first made, it gets a lot of attention, it's replayed so much that it gets annoying. Then nobody wants to listen to it anymore, and just like that it's gone. No one cares about it anymore, it's no longer of importance.
"Do you think you'll dream of me tonight?"
That's her biggest fear; that's what keeps her up at night. She doesn't want whatever they are, what they have, to end. She wants to refer to them as we and brag about how amazing he is to all of her stuck up friends that act like they're too good for her. She wants someone to be in her corner, to care about her, yet she's worried that she'll never be loved by someone, she's worried that she'll never be able to love someone.
It's her thoughts that keep her up at night. He keeps her up at night.
"If I sleep, I'll dream of you."
