Paperboy. (h.s. au)

32.

Birdy's list:

1.) learn a sport.

2.) take a road trip.

3.)

• • •

Two days after Harry asked that I make a list, I finish it. Kind of.

For two days, I had to organize my scattered mind and think of three things I really, actually wanted to happen. All the while trying to cope with the overwhelming happiness I felt when I thought about how someone actually wanted me to think about what I wanted and write them down. Then to further that feeling, someone who wanted to help me get those things done. Unbelievable.

So I started simple.

Number one: learn a sport. How to play a sport, more specifically. Be good at it? That's probably a bit too much to ask for. So I settle for learning one, and possibly even sticking with it. I keep the part where I stick with it to myself, as it's too much of a commitment to write down.

All I know is that I've tried several sports before, each one of my tries to carry out the habit of wanting to like it and wanting to keep doing it were more futile than the last. Maybe I was doing something wrong. Maybe something was missing. I don't know. But let's give it a try, why don't we?

I'm not saying I want to go pro. But hey, if I happen to do so, I can't complain.

Number two: take a road trip.

This is something I've always wanted to do, for real. I always thought I'd either take one by myself, or with my friends. But Victoria and Lily haven't actually been too fantastic to me lately, for whatever reason. Not that they've been rude or mean or anything, just very distant. I think they're afraid of me. That they'll "catch" my illness like its an immune system thing. Whatever. I've decided I'm not going to care anymore unless they do. I'm always the one to care more, now that I think of it. With those two, I was always the one who used to make plans, to talk to them first. Until I stopped, then they did too.

Anyway. A road trip.

To where? No idea.

How long? Not sure.

With whom? Well.

I've always loved the idea of this. Just picking up a few things, loading up into a car, and going. Maybe I won't even know where, maybe I'll make it up as I go. Maybe I won't even tell anyone. I've always been someone with a secret spontaneous nature, or at least someone who wanted one. With a lust to do something crazy for once. To be unrestrained, free even. But.

And number three. I never could figure out a solid number three. The space on the napkin next to the number was smudged, greying and almost ripped from so much re-writing and re- erasing. I had to (not)write that one in pencil.

There are too many possibilities for number three. It's the final thing on my list, it can't be something like "bake a cake," or "catch a fly in chopsticks." But let's be honest, that last one would be pretty great.

For the last number on my list, I need something big, bold. Something I'll remember. Because it's number three, and it can't be boring. It just can't. I won't have it.