"Harry! Please Harry wait, don't leave me.. if you just give me a small chance I will prove it to you that i will be one of the best decisions you'll ever make" I screamed, my tears streaming down my face like a river " just stay" I whispered looking at him with bloodshed eyes.
With a strange look on his face, he turned around and walked away like he didn't even hear me. And he just disappeared into the woods.
I completely lost hope.
"Harryyyyy" I yelled again but this time I wasn't alone in the forest.
I was in my bed.
I looked around but I couldn't see anything. It was pretty dark..
I can feel my heart pounding in my ears, my eyes were watering and i couldn't control the tears.
Flashbacks of my dream or shall i say nightmare wouldn't get out of my mind.
When i was a child, Mom said, if I went to bed late, the monsters would come and abduct me when I would be asleep. But it wasn't a ghost, or a monster which mom used to scare me when I didn't like to go to sleep because they never came..
He was the one who came and abducted my mind and took it with him..
I let out a deep sight and then i lit the lamp and took my phone to check the time.
It was 2 p.m and i couldn't help but get up from my bed and went to the dressing room to put in my jacket and to walk down stairs.
I tried to not make noise to not wake up mom and my sister.
I get out of the house shutting the door behind me carefully.
The sun has gone to rest and the moon takes his place as the darkness is surrounding the whole place.
I like the night, it hides my flaws, my imperfections, the scars burned onto my flesh, the stabs of knives left behind.
When the twilight fades to blackness it lights a fire inside my guts. It burns away the drabness of the day, the clock in and the clock out, the mechanized life, robotic and cold. The night means downtown is lit by the neon lights of the clubs and bars, shinning on the rain-kissed sidewalks. At night you can be anybody and no-one cares who you really are.
So in my retro outfit from an era even my mother never knew, I step into the darkness. The stars are somewhere behind the haze of black cloud that is stretched thinly above and the transitory moonlight bleaches the grey-scale world momentarily, and then it is gone. My mind is a blur with possibilities, each more fanciful than the next.
I was sitting in my usual place,the swing admiring the stars who are shining in this dark sky and thinking about if
i am a star in someone's sky..
I always go to this park whenever I feel sad or disappointed and that's why I am here in the middle of the night..
Legend says when you can't sleep, it's because you're awake in someone's else dream.
And if i am awake in his dream ?
I can't get his flawless face out of my mind, even if i tried..
Could this be love at the first sight?
Wow.
This is sweet. So sweet. But dangerous.
Love..Four letters scares me to death..
Love is something that i couldn't reach in my real life and i think I will never..
To love someone isn't just an overwhelming feeling. It's a decision and mostly a promise and since people are too bitchy with promises I decided to keep it to my heart
The truth, is I did beleive in love once but it didn't beleive in me and it just escaped from me because apparently I was destined to forever fall in love with people I couldn't have. Maybe there's a whole assortment of impossible people waiting for me to find them. Waiting to make me feel the same impossibility over and over again..
However much i wanted someone to want me, there was nothing i could do to make it happen. Whatever i did for them, whatever i gave them, whatever i let them take, it could never be enough. Never enough to be sure. Never enough to satisfy them. Never enough to stop them walking away.
Never enough to make them love you.
And that's why I don't want to love this guy because I don't even know the meaning of loving someone and to be loved in return..
So what's the good thing about love ? Absolutely nothing..
Love is a weird thing.. you just pick up that person and then you're like :Oh I like that one and I'll let him ruin my life forever"
So I guess you already noticed that what I was afraid of was
Falling in love.
But why When we first shook hands I could hear my heart bursting inside? His touch sent Shrivers and chills went through every single part of my body? I admit that i wished that this moment could last forever but it did not.. i can remember the fact that his hands were large and hot and i just wanted to never let them go.. I felt something weired when he first touched my skin.. Something that brought me back to life.
I just kept looking at his flawless face all the whole time with admiration..
But,The worst thing is that I was just one of the random girls that he meets every day .
I kept thinking about not seeing his breathtaking face again.. not seeing his shining eyes one more time..
Oh wait a second. I am not even sure that I'll meet him again so that can never be love.
Alright ?
"Yeah right Eva you're so clever"
I said to myself bursting into laughter.
The calming presence of the night, makes me slowly close my eyes, my body quietly switching off; but it lets my soul run free. I can do the things I would never be allowed to do when the sun is out. I can do whatever I want...as my worries, my thoughts, silently burn into smoke as they wonder through the endless night once more.
___
I felt something tickling my face once I opened my eyes facing the blue sky.. It was a beautiful butterfly flying next to me.
The early morning sun was already well risen and the spring grass shine like it had its own gentle glow from within. The air felt refrigerated, that same coolness combined with moisture . Though it was late enough for bright light, it was early enough for the streets to be almost deserted.
I found myself laying on the grass and i couldn't remember how I moved from the swing to this place..
I searched my phone in my pockets to check the time, It was almost 7 a.m..
So, I took my stuff and walked towards our house before that mom could notice my absence..
-----
Heeey lovers, thank you so much for giving my book a chance.. It means the world to me..
And I am a sorry because there is not such an important thing in this chapter but i promise that the next one will be more exciting than this..:)
All the Love Xx
