11pm Phanfiction

Dan and Fil

"Good morning Dan," Phil said, slowly emerging from his room. Dan looks at Phil in shock. He hasn't seen him in 2 days and that never happens. They are practically glued together. They tried to do that once but Phil needed the bathroom and Dan was uncomfortable so he broke free whilst singing Breaking Free by Zack Efron. Did you kno he didn't even sing it? I bet he was on the naughty list that year. That is a sin. When Dan found out he burned his Zack Efron top and book. He also threw some pictures of Phil he had away. It was getting creepy. He had Phil on his walls. All you saw was his face. Anyway, this isn't the point. I just wanted to share some embarrassing stories about Dan.
"Phil I'm moving in with Alfie Deyes," Dan sighed. He already packed his bags. He secretly loves Alfie and Alfie secretly loves himself. Phil cried and called Alfie. Alfie picked up after 0.0000000000000001 seconds. He also loves Phil but low key loves him. That is why he tried to steal his challenge idea. Fact time. Did you no Phil got married to Dan but forgot about it? R00d, I know. Then Phil got married to Alfie but Alfie broke up with him because he was cheating on Phil with Alfie 2. This broke Phils nose off. He quickly glue it back on though because there was a glue stick. Anyway I'm digressing. On with the story.
"U wot m8" Alfie yelled into the phone. Phil screamed.
"KEEP YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF OF MY WIFE." Phil yelled. Dan cried.
"ILL HAVE U NO I WAS NUMBER 1 HIPSTER OF 2001. I WAS A HIPSTER BEFORE BEING A HIPSTER WAS EVEN A THING. THATS HOW HIPSTER I AM. THATS RIGHT IM THAT COOL DID U NO IM PLAYING FIVE NIGHTS AND FREDDIES WITH ALL THE LIGHTS OFF RIGHT NOW? THATS RIGHT IM THAT COOL. SO DONT YOU GO THINKING YOUR COOLER THAN ME CUZ UR NOT. YOUR A PSYCHO. YOU CUT MY ELECTRICITY WHEN I WAS ON NIGHT 1263 ON FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDIES. THAT IS ACTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE BUT YOU KNOW WHAT NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE YOU JUST HAVE TO BELIEVE AND THAT IS WHAT I DID SO DONT YOU DARE SAY YOUR MORE HIPSTER THAN ME BY THE WAY I AM COOLER AND HAVE MORE FRIENDS SO FIGHT ME. I WILL CREATE YOU ON THE SIMS AND KILL YOU THATS HOW FREAKING MAD I AM RIGHT NOW GO HOME YOU FILTHY PEASENT. SO HELP ME IF WE EVER MEET AT VIDCON YOU WILL GET SLAPPED ROUND YOUR NOSE CUZ YOUVE BEEN BAD. DID U NO ITS ONLY JANUARY AND UR ALREADY ON THE NAUGHTY LIST? THATS BAD PHIL. DID U NO I AM SANTA. I AM ALFIE BY DEYE AND SANTA AT NIGHT GET IT? SO U WILL GET SLAPPED FOR SINNING. I SAW WHAT HAPPENED AFTER PINOF 7. THAT WAS NOT NICE. YOU SHOULD NOT HUG DAN LIKE THAT YOU ARE 29. HE IS 24 HE IS ONLY A BABY AND YOU ATTACKED HIM LIKE ATTACK ON TITAN DID U NO I WATCHED ATTACK ON TITAN BEFORE IT WAS COOL? I AM SUCH A HIPSTER. MORE HIPSTER THAN YOULL EVER BE. DID U NO UR HURTING ME EMOTIONALLY? IM CALLING THE POLICE MAN. UR CYBER BULLYING ME, IM THE VICTIM YOU NERD. ALSO I PLAYED CAN UR PET BEFORE I EVEN EXISTED. IM SUCH A HIPSTER OMG-" Alfie yelled into the phone without breathing once. Phil smashed his phone before Alfie could speak again.
"But Den, wot aboot us? Wot aboot everything we've been through?" Phil sang.
"But Fil wot aboot trust? U no I never wonted to hert you" Dan sang along.
"Wot aboot me?" Phil sang
"Wot am I supposed to do?" Dan sang but got a notification. It was Alfie.
Alfie: CAN U TELL FIL IM NUMBER 1 HIPSTER AND I KILLED HIM ON THE SIMS? THX ALSO HES ON DA NAUGHTY LIST. DID U NO IM NOT SANTA. I LIED TO LOOK COOL THATS HOW HIPSTER I AM. DONT TELL FIL THAT THO CUZ HE WILL THINK HES MORE HIPSTER THAN ME K BYE
Suddenly phil disappeared. Oh noes. Looks like it's all ogre now. Or is it?