Realizations and a confession of truth

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 Haha. I like to leave cliff hangers! ~smirks~ '  This chapter is rated R

 Here you guys go J

     (Jason’s POV)

       It was time to go back home. I’d been gone for five days.  It was Thursday now. I didn’t want mom to completely freak out. And I know Brit was super pissed at Chris. Just because I didn’t go home though…didn’t mean I didn’t go to school. I had a house. I owned it. Well…thanks to my dad.

Dad…I miss him. So much. “Dad, I don’t know if you can hear me…but I just want you to know that I did what you wanted. I went out for football. And became the best. But I just…don’t want it anymore. I hope you’re proud of me now. That’s what I wanted. Was to make you proud. And I’m so sorry. For the way I acted towards you that night. I just…I was angry because I didn’t want to do it and you kept pressuring me. I didn’t mean for you to….God dad…I miss you and I love you so much….Just please forgive me…please.?” I pleaded. I was now on my knees, with tears sliding down my face.

   I thought for a while…guess you could really call it reminiscing. I loved my dad. With all my heart. And now he’s gone…and it’s all my fault. Why is it I have to be the screw up all the time…just…why?!

  I punched the door, glad that I didn’t put a hole in it. I need to leave here before I do something stupid.

I grabbed my keys off the table downstairs and left the secret house. I kept my mind clear of everything while I drove, until I got home.

I walked in the door hesitantly. Not wanting to be home since Chris was next door. “I’m home!” I called out. I heard feet running down the stairs and of course…it was my little sister.

 She jumped up and wrapped her arms and legs around me. “Jason!” She called. “Sorry I was gone so long sweetie.” I whispered and nuzzled my face in her hair. She climbed down. “It’s fine Jason.” She said. I nodded. Mom appeared from behind her and then hugged me gently.

“Are you ok son?” She asked, looking into my eyes and trying to read them. I nodded. She sighed. I gave her a questioning look, she only shook her head and walked off. I looked at Brit who seemed to be looking anywhere but me.

  “Um, Amy is upstairs…So I got to go.” She said shyly. I raised an eye brow. She ran up the stairs. I shook my head. Then walked into my room.

  I threw my keys on the dresser and went to lay down. Until I noticed someone was already there. And of all the people in the world…It had be Chris…

I sighed and ran a hand over my face. Then through my hair.

He looked over at me. “Why are you here?” I asked, lacing my voice with ice.

He flinched. “I’m confused and lost.” He answered.

“What’s there to be confused about? You were making out with Alex… Oh and the flirting with the waitress…” I left off. I think all the color in his face just drained.

“Jason…It was just a kiss. And that waitress was an old friend who knows I’m gay.” He said. “But you were both flirting!” I raised my voice. He stood up and got in my face.

 “It doesn’t matter Jason. It doesn’t freaking matter! None of them matter to me! I’m so tired of waiting… I’ve been gay for a while. I fell in love with you. I’ve waited forever…to be with you. Yeah I had the opportunity, but I felt selfish for taking it. You need time to sort yourself out, I know how it goes. I went down that road. But if you think I’m not going to get a boyfriend and just follow you around and let you kiss me or touch me whenever you please and not when I please, then I’m sorry, but you don’t own me.” He said.

It hurt like hell. The words he said. I don’t need time. I know I have feelings.

I watched him head towards the door, but I grabbed him and pulled him to me in a kiss. His arms wrapping around my waist. I backed him up towards the door and then put my palm against his cheek and deepened the kiss. His hands slid down to my hips and he pulled me tight against him. I had to balance myself to keep from crushing him against the wall.

   I pulled away to catch my breath. He kissed my jaw line to my neck and left butterfly kisses up and down one side. Then he hit my sweet spot and without thinking I bit his shoulder. Not hard but not soft either. I heard his breath catch in his throat, then he pushed me back.

I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. “Sorry.” I whispered breathless. “No it’s fine.” He said. I looked at him and his face was flushed. “Um…what now?” I asked awkwardly.

He chuckled and walked over to me. “We could try that again.” He whispered quietly. I slightly nodded.

A/N: (There is boyxboy action here, don’t like don’t read, and don’t say I didn’t warn you because I did!)

He came towards me slowly, hesitantly. After he got to me, he put his hands on my shoulders and slowly slid them down my arms and kissed me. Gently at first, then harder. He laced our fingers together. I softly sighed into the kiss and he pulled my lip between his teeth and nibbled lightly on it.

 I unlaced our fingers and then twisted my fingers into his hair and pulled him closer to me, causing us both to fall back and land on the bed. Our kiss only got more heated.

  His body was on top of mine and I noticed this. I broke away from the kiss and he trailed butterfly kisses from my jaw line to my neck, making a shiver run down my spine. He kissed down to my collar bone and nibbled on it, I bit my lip to keep from letting out a moan.

  He looked up at me. “Um…Jason…Can I…Um…Is it ok if….Um…Well…can I um…touch you? And if you don’t like any of it I swear I will stop it’s just…that I want you right now but I mean…Um…I’m willing to wait for you but I just…I want to make sure that you also end up enjoying yourself and-” I put my finger to his lips and nodded.

 He smiled ever so slightly and then he took off my shirt and kissed a trail to my pants…He started to undo them with his teeth but there was a knock on me door so I quickly threw my shirt back on and opened my door.

  Brit was leaning against the frame with a smirk on her face. “Dinner will be ready in like five minutes. Only this time…don’t take forever.” She smiled then walked off. I stood there staring after her. But soon Christian dragged me back inside my room. He pushed me onto the bed but he went and locked the door.

  He made his way over to me and I decided to just take my shirt off. He kissed me and then slowly kissed his way down my chest. I shivered with each kiss. I felt him smile against my skin. He undid my pants and then started kissing me again. He pulled my pants down a bit and then I felt him grab my erect member.

   I gasped. He kissed my neck and then started sucking on it. Marking me. His hand slowly started to pump up and down. I let out a breath. He kissed the mark he made. “You’ve got five minutes.” I hissed in his ear as his hand pumped me a little bit faster. “I can make it in time.” He replied, I could hear the smile in his voice.

  “Watch me.” He whispered into my ear. I shivered at the contact. I looked down at him and watched as he took my whole shaft into his mouth. I bit my lip to nearly bleeding just to keep from making any sounds. He came back up but left his lips around me. Swirling his tongue around the tip. I gripped the sheets of my bed tightly in both my hands.

 He began to suck me fast and before three minutes was up I was about to burst. “Chri-chris..I-I’m ab-about t-t-t-to-” He put a finger to my lips, then slowly drug it down my chest and it sent me over the edge. My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I felt as he swallowed every drop of me I had to give.

“Christian…that was…wow.” I said breathless. He smirked. “Thank you, and we still have two minutes left. So you can catch your breath.” He grinned. I gave him a playful glare. He ruffled my hair. I put my pants back on and then threw m shirt on again to.

   “Come on.” I said walking past him to the door. “We should go help with dinner.” I said.

Well here’s another chapter. I did my best I was slightly distracted. Anyways hope you didn’t mind it. PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS?!?!?!?!

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