Photograph

1||Holiday

"Can I borrow one of those American dollars?"

Rolling my eyes I give Nicola my ivory wallet, with hand painted red roses on it, intending for her to take out a dollar only but she takes out a twenty and proceeds to order food instead of the bottle of water she originally wanted.

I don't mind really, Nicola is not a mooch in any way possible, she has her own successful moneymaking job, but every time she comes to visit me from England to here in America, she always fails to get a conversion of American dollars.

Not many people are at this restaurant today, it's not a really expensive one but it's one of my favorites, Ihop, best pancakes that I've ever had really.

The food is now being taken care of, and I extend my hand across the table, her pale palm connects with mine like I intended.

"I've missed you so much"

"How is that possible?"

Her delicate, deep dazzling blue eyes were just beaming as they usually are when she comes to visit me. The first couple of times, she came and we would party her holiday away. Miami is definitely for that. But now we just eat. Miami is good for that as well.

"Kimberley, all you do is fly from Miami to California and back because you're an actress of some sorts"

"I am an actress of all sorts. I think I'm a good one"

"A great one. One that has an Oscar. A great one. And probably up for another one soon"

I blush before Nicola gets into why she's really here. Aside from her usually coming for a month every two months.

"Here. I didn't look in it because you made a very strict note not for anyone to look in it. Very intimidating"

Nicola slides an onyx photo album across the beige surface and my handwriting is scribbled in white out because a black sharpie wouldn't show obviously.

"Don't touch- Kimberley :)"

"Intimidating. I shook in my boots"

Shaking my head, I open the album and the first page are littered in Polaroids of Nic and I. All throughout our childhood really. I turn another page, my heartbeat is becoming more rapid and I feel I know why.

"I'll look at the rest later-"

My fingers try to close the book but Nic sticks her hand on the page I was on. She was up to no good.

"Open the book back up and turn the page"

Tilting my head in the air, I stare at the white tiles that create the ceiling, exhaling a sharp breath before my eyes locate a speaker and my ears begin to hear someone that I believe is pictured on the next page.

"Cheryl's on the speaker" Nicola says my thoughts out loud before I look back down and turn the page, all of these Polaroids were just of me and her.

"Do you miss her?"

For five years, I have had to ignore my feelings, letting work drive away time for me to actually think about her and process getting over her, but I'm still broken.

"No I don't" I lie of course, but I do and we are both engulfed in life that has no space for each of us to re-enter. But I can't help but be curious about how she's been, Nicola is also her friend and I'm well aware she sees her more often then me, being that they're in the same country most of the time.

"How is she?"

"Cheryl is doing pretty well. On her third album"

Third album.

When I left she was only on her first. She was famous and partly that made me want to leave. I didn't want to let to live in her shadows nor drag her behind mine.

"That's great"

That's not really what I want to hear, I want to know that she's moved on and found someone great in her life. Maybe started a family like she always wanted. But not to early being that we were only in our early twenties.

But I don't press on for it because then my lie would dissolve into the atmosphere.

"When are you coming home? See your mum and your brother and sisters. Adam is constantly asking for me to bring you home"

"I'll be home soon"

Another lie probably. I wasn't filming any movies at the moment, my agent told me to give it a rest for a while, I'm not in any financial problems and just live. He says that I'm stressing myself out despite that these are all good performances.

I mean technically home is here. When my mother split with my father when I was about five, I had to move here, well it was Connecticut specifically, and I stayed here for ten years, going to England for the summers and holidays until my mother wanted me to complete high school there.

So out of all of my siblings, I was the only one who lacked the distinct Bradford accent, it's only evident in some of my words but rarely would anyone hear it.

Nicola gets up to ask someone where the restroom is and I look back reluctantly at the photos, looking at how bad of a photographer I was. One of these photos is just one of her big coffee colored eyes. But in the others, she was smiling even the one where she stuck her middle finger up at me in.

The song goes off but to torture me further, this specific Ihop has a depressing playlist on replay, so the next song that plays is I Miss You by Adele.

Closing the book, I stuff it beside my left thigh letting it lean against the wall before I pull out my phone. I don't check any of the social media notifications but I open my messages, the first of the thousand from my older sister, Sally.

Mum says when are you coming home?

I just lock my phone, all signs are pointing for me to return home but if I do I won't enjoy myself. I guarantee I won't. Being so close to her and knowing she probably doesn't want to be bothered with me or drop her life for me it's ridiculous.

"Have you seen the pancakes? They're enormous"

Laughing, we get our own set of pancakes and begin to discuss what we are going to do now that I have Nicola for a month.

"I want to go to that basketball place again"

"Again- last time was a disaster"

I think back two months ago when the ball came Nicola's way, I had got us the best seats, we were literally behind the Miami Heat team players and Nicola immediately dropped to the floor, rolling under my feet and the ball never it made it that far.

"That was embarrassing" I say stuffing some pancake in my mouth.

"It was really" Nicola looks away but her pink lips curl into a smile anyway.

"We can go again, since you liked it outside of that horrendous mishap"

We begin to plan other things, a lot of it includes sleeping and eating because that's what we do best. And I know that I will enjoy myself but I know when she's not around, I'll be opening that book and looking more at pictures of Cheryl.

Because now she's here with me, in these photos and I just can't ignore the feelings any longer.

Alright this is my new story guys. I know it has been like six billion years but I felt like writing again. So hopefully you all will enjoy it. :)