December Is Love

The Text

Yesterday, 7th January, 2016, I recieve a text at 10:00 p.m. as the time stamp said. I was asleep that night. Next morning, I wake up at 9, checking my phone hoping there would be a text from her. This was the best morning for me, she texted, but, when I read it, I knew something had to be mended by me. She only talked about two things, my approach towards her friend to make her birthday the best, in which of course I failed. The other about her two pictures which I had uploaded on Instagram as a gift on the completion of our Three months and Five months of relationship, those two pictures were my life for me, they always made me smile, they proved that yes she loved me once, maybe she still does, I am not so sure. She asked me to delete them, she never gave me a reason, just like she did it before. She was rude, she was arrogant, this time she wasn't the one I wished she was but I was happy that she was the one I still love. I cried this time while talking to her. I felt like a dead man all over again. I just wanted to tell her a thousand things which I couldn't. I always failed because she hated me now. I still love her, because I know that the girl she appears to be is just because of the problems and responsibilities she had. I was always a kid, especially for her. A single text from her made me miss her all the more. I cried for hours this day, I just wanted her as a friend. I still can't figure out what my fault was. I still go through all the conversations a thousand times just to see where I went wrong. I was always bad at expressing my feelings, but I did it anyway. This day had been better than the others, as I spent some minutes of my day talking to her, I wish she thought of me like I always did. I am still waiting to get the answers or just get her back. I can always promise her that I wont discuss all this once she is back. I always kept my promises, I wish she did too. I would just like to tell you that yes this boy here still LOVES YOU MORE THAN HIS LIFE.