All my life I would like to think of myself as a normal average kid. I was only 17 and for all of my childhood I was chubby, really chubby. I never really thought much about my appearance until the day came where everything changed.
When I was 12 a boy named Thomas put his arm around me, it was the closest I had ever gotten with any guy and stupidly I thought it was going some where.
I wore loose dresses and baggy jumpers to cover my 'figure '. Soon realising, I wanted to change. I changed my diet and physical work outs trying to lose weight but my parents disagreed with my actions as I was to young so I let them choose my meals.
At the age of 13, I was fully in control of what I ate and how regularly I worked out. I had lost 29kg within a year making me 37kg . I was happy with what I looked like. Everyone was worried if my actions would cause me to have an eating disorder or become ill but I knew I could control myself!
Now here I was, 17 year old me weighing 42kg. I was healthy and happy and ate right foods and I was my way of being normal despite any one telling me any different.
I realised that words didn't matter I knew that I would live to impress my father and hopefully find someone to full fill my dreams and desires. However that wasn't always the case, I found it difficult to interact with people. What was I meant to say, what if they didn't like me? I constantly thought about my beings.
I would soon meet my idols for the third time and this time for over 5 hours. I hope everything would work out the way I planned so inside my head.
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Unforgettable love
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