Tevun-Krus #8 - Dystopian SF

Joy To Deprever, by @MadMikeMarsbergen *SOMEWHAT GRAPHIC IN NATURE*

JOY TO DEPREVER

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THE DEPREVERIAN TIMES
Sunday June 5, 2033
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, DEPREVER!

'FIRST THING I'M GONNA DO IS WASTE MY GRANDPARENTS!' SAYS ERIC FILSTROM, 17, ECSTATIC DEPREVERIAN YOUTH
by Frank Fitzfarrell
The Depreverian Times staff writer

YES,it's that time of the year again. The most wonderful time of the year. When the sound of delightfully cheerful music can be heard flooding through the streets, and the atmosphere is addicting and infectious. Impossible to ignore! Murdersex is in the air and life is oh so fair!
The anniversary of Deprever is here! We're all one year older now, and all lucky to be here in this gem of a supracountry. Remember to salute our great and glorious Leader tonight, when He makes His much-anticipated appearance from the top of the Freedom Spire.Without Him, surely we would all be lost and dying in the decay of the wasteland beyond. It isn't safe out there!
But enough negativity. Let's think positive! What have all you Depreverians got planned for the celebrations of tonight and tomorrow?
Perhaps a relaxing romp with a Sexxslaven minor? Club Sexxxerotica is the place to be. Buy one, get one free—today and tomorrow only! You don't want to miss an exciting opportunity like this!
Or maybe a gangbang on a sex-bot, with a group of your closest friends and family? Talk about a bonding experience! For your enjoyment, we've attached some handy-dandy coupons to The Horse Lounge, valid throughout our two-day celebration. Half-price for anyone under eighteen, and entirely free for those in a party of six or more!
Or if you feel like seeing some blood, how about a family-friendly trip to The Slaughterhouse, where you can let your hair down and get wild?Cripples, midgets, the homeless, and MORE! Kill 'em all and feel good in knowing you're serving Deprever! Out with the old and in with the new! It's two for the price of one—today and tomorrow only!
Want to see a real-life gladiator match? Head down to The Kitty Ring and watch two Kattemen fight to the death! Bet on the kitty you think will win, and you never know—you might just get lucky! Enclosed area couple betting stubs, both worth five dollars. Win or lose: It's on the house—so go crazy, Deprever!
And all you folks who like to kick it old-school, we've still got the annual Resolution to look forward to, over at Centre Square, beside the Maypole, in downtown Deprever City. Classic entertainment there—come one, come all: the fun begins at 12:06 AM sharp, shortly after the clock strikes midnight. And if you can't make it to the City, you can view the festivities from the comfort of your home, via the television. Either way, you're in for a fantastic Deprever Day!
But don't take it from me. How about some exciting first-hand admissions from your fellow Depreverians, eh?
"First thing I'm gonna do is waste my grandparents!" says Eric Filstrom, 17, an ecstatic Depreverian youth who also does volunteer work at The Slaughterhouse in his free time. "They're getting to be a burden on all of us, and since I'm the oldest one—out of all my siblings—I get first dibs. It's f*cking hardcore! I can't decide between the hammer and the power drill..."
Miranda Jessup, 23, and a contestant on last year's season of Deprever's hit reality television show, The Next Top Whore Of Deprever, wishes all you Depreverians to stay reckless and exercise suitably thoughtless behaviour. "It's, like, not every year that we get Deprever Day, you know. Well, it is, but that's,like, beside the point. Like, when I was on TNTWOD, I realized that it was, like, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, so I made the most of it, you know? I'm crushed I didn't, like, win... but thanks to our fabulous society, I can pretend that I did. And Deprever Day is a great way to, like, embrace all that! I love you, Leader! WOOOO!!!"
But not all Depreverians are happy, unfortunately. Before being taken away by the Deprever Police Department for processing, Winston Marx, 39,managed to have a short—albeit scattered and deranged—talk with us. "This isn't right! Deprever is a sick society, a world built for psychos to thrive. You can't win! They drug our food, our water,the air is toxic. They want us to be content with this enslavement.This horror show we live and breathe. This reverence for the depraved. You all make me sick! SICK! SIIII—!"
Don't let the weirdos drag you down. The Winston Marxes of the world are a clear minority, not normal, and, therefore, severely mentally ill. We wish him all the best, and know that he will receive all thehelp he needs. Upon successful rehabilitation at one of the many Deprever Reprogramming Clinics, he will return to our great society achanged man: One who functions as he should, engages in all the wonders of our superior culture, and doesn't call the rest of us normal, happy Depreverians horribly insulting names, like sick and psycho.
Thismissive has gone on long enough. Happy Deprever Day, everyone! Makeit a special one, one you will always remember. Whatever fits your fancy, come on out and enjoy the evening with the rest of your fellow Depreverians. Don't be a numbrod!