Stay [a danisnotonfire fanfiction]

Fading smiles

I UPDATED. I LITERALLY FORCED MYSELF TO. THANKYOU FOR CARING, I HOPE THIS DOESN'T SUCK,  ILY.

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I throw myself backwards onto my bed, the biggest smile on my face. I'm Dan's girlfriend. I sit up again, squinting as the bright sunlight hits me in the face, before skipping out of my bedroom and into the art room. I've not spent much time in here recently, I realise, I've been too busy out and about actually having a life, with Dan and Phil. The smile never leaves my face, as I sit down once again infront of the enourmous canvas. A few more little details work their way onto the colours; two milkshake cups, the High School Musical logo, a couple that appear to be waltzing, a tiny number '19'... I hear a faint knock on the apartment door and get up to answer it, carefully placing my paintbrushes down. I half skip through the apartment to the front door, and open it with a big smile, but before I can say I word I'm cut off with Dan's lips on mine. He pushes me backwards and closes the door with his foot, never breaking the kiss. We stumble into the front room and I fall back onto the couch, pulling him with me. 

"I missed you" he whispers, reattaching our lips. I smile into the kiss and feel him do the same.

"I only left your place two hours ago."

"Yeah. But that's two hours worth of kisses we have to catch up on, huh?" 

"Oh, definitely," I chuckle breathlessly, reaching back up and continuing the kiss. I run my fingers through his hair and rest one hand on the back of his neck, the other at his waist. The kiss is passionate, almost hungry. It's the type of kiss that causes you to lose track of time and space, and forget every piece of knowledge you've ever had. Nothing else matters, at all. It's just the two of you, both unaware of where you are or what else is happening in the world. The only things you feel is that crazy intense happiness; every other emotion is lost, and you're not sure if you'll ever find them again, or even if you want to. It feels as if the kiss lasts for hours, although it's probably barely even minutes. 

"Hey, can I ask you something?" Dan asks gently, resting his forehead against mine. 

"You just did," I wink. "Kidding. Of course you can." I smile.

"Why are you so afraid of train stations?" 

I sigh. "You want the real reason?" 

"I understand if you don't want to talk about it." 

"No, it's okay. You know I told you about my friend Emily, who went to Australia?" he nods. "Her mum didn't drive. She was taking Emily and I to the beach one time, we were fourteen. We were waiting at the train station, and it was empty apart from these four guys on the platform opposite us. They were staring. And then they disappeared. As kids, Emily and I thought nothing of it. But Natalie, her mum, got really nervous. She kept looking over her shoulders and started shaking a little. Again, we didn't think this meant anything. Until she screamed. I jumped off of the bench that we were all sitting on, and almost fell down onto the tracks. Emily caught my arm. We turned round and three of the guys had surrounded Natalie. We couldn't see her, but we didn't need to, we knew what was happening." My eyes start to sting, but I blink away the tears. "There was a gunshot. Then two more. One of the guys ran, the other two stayed for a little longer. A few minutes passed and Emily and I were left alone in the station again. Natalie's coat was missing, as were her bag and shoes. We couldn't move. Emily started screaming. Louder than I'd ever heard anyone scream. Scarier than the screams in the horror films we watched despite being told not to. I didn't know what to do. We just stood and stared, for what felt like hours, until a woman in a uniform came running over to us. She was saying things I didn't understand, asking me questions I couldn't answer." There are too many tears to blink back this time. They cascade across my cheeks, leaving ugly mascara tracks, but I don't even care. "She was 33 years old. That's too young to die, Dan. Way too young. She had a kid, and a fiance. She wasn't even married. How unfair is that? They killed her before she got to experience the best day of her life. For a little money. I-" I choke, I can't carry on. "Dan, I-" 

I break down again. I have to try my best not to start screaming. The tears fall until there's nothing left, I'm all cried out. My body aches from crying, I can't even move. Dan doesn't move either. It must be twenty minutes before one of makes a sound. 

"Envy, I- I'm so sorry." Dan whispers, voice choked. 

I shake my head. "Don't be. It was five years ago." 

"That doesn't matter, En. I can't believe something so horrible could happen to you." he says gently, wrapping his arms around me tightly. I reast my head on his shoulder and put my arms around his waist. "I'm sorry for breaking down like that, again." I sigh. 

"Don't be silly, it's my fault for bringing it up." 

"I think that was what I needed. I haven't told anyone that story. Max was the only other person that knew."

Dan looks at me questioningly, "who's Max?" he asks.

"Oh, just my ex boyfriend. We broke up a few months ago because he's always touring and we rarely see eachother. It got a little too much, I guess." I explain, with a shrug of my shoulders. 

"Touring? What, was he in a band or something?" 

"Yeah. You ever heard of You Me At Six?" I ask. Dan nods. "He plays guitar." I tell him. 

"That's pretty cool," he smiles, "I'd love to tour like that."  

I smile back. "Yeah, it'd be pretty cool. I want to see America. Let's go to America!" I say excitedly.

Dan chuckles, "maybe one day, En, maybe one day."