Losing

Chapter 15

After about an hour of wondering around the village and mostly crying I stepped through my front door. The door was unlocked thank God. I had forgotten my key. Happiness took over me when I realized I was the only one here. I made my way over to the kitchen and found a huge mess. Neither Leighton or Finn had cleaned up. I rolled my eyes and opened my back door. Prince jumped up and greeted me. I smiled weakly and hugged my Boston Terrier. I took a sit on one of the chairs in the garden. I haven't been out here in what feels like ages. I hate it.

I took my pack of cigarettes out along with my lighter and sparked one up. I inhaled the dirty smoke and sighed. I need to get more soon. Prince whined and then barked. I rolled my eyes and stroked him. He's so demanding. This made me laugh. I actually laughed. I continued to smoke my cigarette for another five minutes before it near enough reached the filter. I put it out in a puddle before putting it in the bin. I opened the door and waited for Prince to run along inside. I closed it once we were both in the house and then went over to the sink. I got a glass out and ran the cold tap. Once I was done I decided to go upstairs. I called after Prince to see if he wanted to come, but he didn't. I shrugged. No big deal.

I walked upstairs and to my bedroom. I opened the door and found Finn just sitting on my bed looking at all my photos up on my wall. Photos of my parents and I looking all so happy. He was taking everything in. His face was hard to understand though. His facial expression would change from sad to happy ever so often. I coughed making him sigh. He turned to face me and looked down awkwardly.

"I didn't see you there," He sighed again.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered.

"I wanted to see you," He whispered back. 

"How did you get in?" I whispered. We continued to speak in whisper. I guess it was easier. I don't know how or why.

"Your front door was unlocked," He told me. I nodded. "I'm so sorry," He sighed. He's sighing an awful lot.

"It's my fault," I sat down on the floor and hugged my knees. "I screamed at you,"

"I didn't mean to fuck everything up," He yelled out in frustration and stood up off the bed.

"I'm sorry," I whispered but he didn't seem to hear me. My eyes started to well up with tears, but I won't let them fall. I won't let him see me cry.

"Why do I have you ruin every fucking thing!" He screamed out as he started to smash objects up in my room that belonged to me.

"Finn," I whispered trying to get his attention. He didn't hear me yet again. I stood up and tried stopping him, but he didn't stop. "Finn please,"

"I can't do this anymore!" He yelled out and pushed me away. I fought back and hugged him tightly. Finn stopped pushing and breaking things. He wrapped his arms around me and cried onto my shoulder. "I'm so sorry," He whispered.

"It's okay," I smiled. My tears wouldn't stop coming, but this still made me smile. Seeing him like this made me some what happy. He can trust me enough to cry in front of me.

"Thank you," He cried out.

"Why don't you calm down?" I pulled away and smiled up at him. Finn nodded and looked down sadly. I sighed. He looked up and gave me a weak smile. "Let's go downstairs,"

We went downstairs and into the kitchen. I sat Finn down at the table and made two cups of coffee. Every now and then I would look back to see Prince at Finn's feet wagging his tail trying to get Finn to play with him. Occasionally Finn would stroke him, but the rest of the time he just say there clueless on what to do next. Once I was done with Finn and I's coffee I walked back to the table and placed one cup in front of him and then I sat down.