The girl who made my life heaven and hell like

Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

Next morning, as soon as I got up, I called Pia in the morning to check on her coming home. Once again, no response. I felt a cold hit on my self esteem. I decided not to call her or talk to her anymore. I was in so much anger. That was when Kiran called me. It was so many months since I spoke to her. But I did not want to talk to Kiran then; it was someone else I wanted to. And that someone else, continued to shunt me off, despite my sincere efforts. I cut Kiran's call and prepared to leave home to get some fresh air. That was when the door bell rang. If it was Pia, I decided to tell her to go away.

It was Pia, like I guessed. But one look at her, and I couldn’t let her walk away. Rather, I pulled her to me in a tight hug.

"Pia, you idiot, what have you done to yourself?". She looked nothing like the Pia I knew. She looked devastated. Her eyes that once twinkled with life, looked red, and had dark circles beneath them. Her hair, that was once silky, now looked all frizzy. I hated to see her like that. I brought her inside and took her to my room.

She gave me a dry smile. "Pia, what is going on?"

I knew she was not going to budge away sooner. It took me few attempts of persuasion.

"Varun, I am sorry, for having been so mean to you. I was trying to stay away from you. It was for our wellness. I don’t want to mess up this relationship, so I decided to shunt my heart, by shunting you away". She began to cry, again.

I understood why she was going through all this. I did not want her to speak anymore. I simply held her and let her take her time to calm down.

"Say something, Varun", she said, looking up at me.

"Pia, I am sorry I let you go through this mess. I am sorry I triggered the feelings in you." She tried to interrupt me, but I continued to talk.

"You made me realize how hard it is to have a life without you," she looked up at me with hope. "But, it is not going to happen, Pia - 'we' is not going to happen in our life. My parents will never accept you, Pia. I grew up seeing them and I know how they are. I cannot force you into their life and make it harder for both of you. You are the most adorable, cheerful girl I have ever met, sweetie. You deserve a much better guy and a much happier life…

"Forget about taking you to my parents. That is secondary. For that to happen, I have to fall in love with you. Taking into account, the way I was brought up by two people, who are completely against love and who valued their self respect more than their own son, I don’t think I could be the person to let them down, and see them disown me."

Pia looked much calmer. That scared me even more. What was she thinking in her head? I wanted her to pour out. But she said nothing and simply nodded her head.

I took her face in my hands, tucked her hair behind her ears. I looked into her eyes for few seconds. "Pia, I am not letting you go through this pain alone, sweetie. This sudden parting of ways is doing neither of us any good. Let us take it gradually. Focus on your studies, get into the career of your choice, make a lot of friends, find new love, and I am accompanying you, as your well-wisher and friend, in all these steps of your life. Remember, if Pia is happy, so is Varun; when Pia smiles, Varun does."

From that minute, Pia was back on her track. I did not know then I was doing the biggest irrevocable mistake of my life, by letting myself back in her life.

Things got to a point where we were neither friends, nor lovers. We were more of soul mates like. We both loved our relationship. It was so beautiful and comfortable. However, I always drew a line between us, but for Pia, there is no border. Infact, I liked her be that way - be her own self and do things that made her happy. Another biggest blunder from my end.

Two years passed by, with so much love, so many fights and so many dreams. I got an onsite offer and left to London, while Pia graduated and got placed in Accenture. I reduced our frequency of talking to each other, and ended our talking through the nights sessions, without being so obvious. I spoke to Pia through Skype, once in a week, and slowly extended it to once in a fortnight. Pia, although seemed reluctant about this, handled it well, believing she did not want to overload my already busy and hectic life.

A year later, on a Saturday morning, I heard the door bell of my apartment ringing. My room-mate had gone out the previous night with his girlfriend. I went to open the door, cursing him for ruining my sleep. But, it took me few seconds to get a hold of myself, when I saw Pia, smiling radiantly at me, when I opened the door.

"Hey handsome, let me in?", she said, winking at me.

"Whoa, what are you doing here?"

"I came here for a three months' duration, for training. I did not throw caution into the wind, so that you don’t go packing somewhere away for three months."

"Where is your roomie?", she asked, handing me my morning coffee. She knew how much sugar I took, and how concentrated I liked. The coffee was so perfect.

"He has gone out last night with his girl friend. Hey what is your plan for the day?"

 "Well, I am not having lunch with the Queen, nor the Princes, till god-knows-when. So, I am unfortunately left to spend my day with you."

"Oh, yeah!! Thank you for your kindness ma'am."

The day I spent was the most happiest day of my twelve months' stay in London. I took her to the cruise across Thames, to pub and a lovely walk back to the room. That was the first night Pia stayed with me.