This Is My Life

8

I woke up shivering in the dark. I looked around and saw that I was still in the forest. It must've been hours, and no one missed me. No one came looking for me. I didn't even want to get up. My body still hurt, and I could feel dried blood plastered to my forehead. My face was covered in dried tears and mud and I couldn't help but feel miserable. 

How could things get worse. When I thought I heard someone coming is when I decided to get up before something happened. I didn't want anyone coming back to finish me off.

I slowly dragged my body off the ground groaning in pain. I could feel bruises and cuts all over my body. I'm not sure how I did it, but I dragged myself all the way home. It was already really late so again my grandmother never even noticed. 

I went to my room to grab clean pajama's and reached for something else. I opened my small box and pulled out my razor. 

I took it with me into the shower and as I washed all the dirt off my body I sliced into my sides, watching the blood run with the water. Again I just stared at it as the water washed it down the drain. Once the bleeding slowed, I did it again, and again. Pressing harder into my skin each time. I had made about 6 cuts in a row and continued until I cried out. I watched as the tub filled with more blood than water. 

I stood emotionless under the hot, steamy water until the water was no longer bloody. I might've been in there for an hour. Then I heard someone knocking on the door.

"Melissa are you in there. You have been in the shower for a while. I need to use the washroom."

Her voice pulled me out of my trance and I turned the water off. 

"One second." I mumbled.

I dressed fast and rushed out the door not making eye contact with my grandmother and keeping my head down, hoping she wouldn't ask me any questions. 

Thankfully, she had to pee too bad to stop to talk to me. She probably didn't care much anyway. 

I got into my bed hoping that when I woke up it wouldn't be in this place.