Diary of a Moody Black Teenager

The Beginning

When my mom found out that she was pregnant with me, she kept it a secret the whole nine months. Honestly. Now you would probably say, "how did nobody notice she was pregnant for an entire nine months?" Well my mom was very skinny. And she always wore baggy sweaters. So when she got pregnant she was scared to tell anybody so she knew that because she wore the baggy sweaters, nobody would think anything of it.

On the day I was born, my grandmother heard my mom in the bathroom screaming. She opened the door and saw my mom on the floor cradling her stomach. That was when my mom told my grandma that she was pregnant. So I didn't have the luxury of anyone preparing for me to come into the world. One day I wasn't there... and the next day I was. The only two people that knew of her pregnancy besides my mom were my sperm donor and my dad. Confused? Let me explain. My dad is technically my step dad. But to me he's just my dad. So that means the sperm donor is my birth father. Like I said I don't really know much about him. I just know that he never wanted to apart of my life, he just wanted my mom. So when she ended their relationship, his relationship with me ended before it could even start.

When my mom realized that she was going to be a single parent, her boyfriend (my dad) said to her, "I'll be her father. Even though I'm not ready to be a parent, I love you, which means I love her too." So my dad moved in with my mom, grandma and great-grandma to help take care of me. My god mother also spent a lot of time helping them out, even though she had five kids of her own. I spent a great deal of my childhood with her, but I barely see her at all now.

I was three years old when my uncle molested me. I was in the basement. I don't even remember what I was doing. To be honest, everything is pretty much blank. I guess I did a good job of erasing that memory. What I do remember is running up the stairs to my grandma. She was the only person home. I went to her and I said, "Grandma, uncle Kenny put a stick up me." And I remember a lot of screaming and yelling and arguing. And then my mom came home. She saw me and she ran to me and picked me up and held me tighter than I've ever been held in my whole life. And then my dad came home and they took me to the emergency room. And when we were pulling off, I saw two police cars pull up. And after that, we left. In the hospital, I remember not really understanding what was going on. I was three. I was sitting up on the bed in one of those little gowns they make you put on. And then this woman came in with two guys behind her. And they examined me and after that all I remember is hearing my mom start crying again. But like I said I didn't really understand what was going on.

So my uncle went to jail. He got out when I was 15. And my mom didn't tell me at first. I heard her talking about it on the phone. And she looked at me and said, "You never have to worry about seeing him again."