Bloodless Day

Epilogue

Mr. Piperson offered me a job at the farm.

A permanent one, as whatever I wanted- trainer, rider, jockey, groom, broodmare manager, with enough pay for me to move out of Mom and Dad's house and support myself and then some, along with a business truck and ability to use a stall should I ever want my own horse.

I turned him down.

Horses are not my whole life- they had made my life whole again, but there was an entire world out there for me to see. I'd found Bloodless Day when we needed each other more than anything in the world. That horse and I had sunk to the bottom of the sea and leapt to the furthest of the stars, going where nobody had ever dreamed us capable. But I am healed now- wholly, permanently. I feel a settling in my soul, an acceptance. Part of life is death, and I can't let that ruin the relationships I have now, the life I'm living now.

I'm standing at the gate, looking across the pasture. It's green, rolling, picture-perfect. And across it canters Bloodless Day, his rocking gait picture-perfect. His ears are pricked, his eyes bright, and his neigh floats on the wind towards me like a melody. A breeze tickles the back of my neck, and I breathe in the deep, summer smell of a horse farm. But with that breath is a hint of warning, of autumn and all the changes that come with it.

College. New friends. New life.

BD skids to a stop at the gate, spraying dirt all over me, snorting fire, neck arched gorgeously as he touches my open palm, whickering curiously as he senses my bittersweet nostalgia. I know he'll be fine without me- this is not a goodbye torn of heartbreak and sorrow. This is a parting of ways, of knowing we've outgrown each other. And with that knowledge is the comfort of a future and a separate path. None of it will be easy, but it's chosen, not hoisted upon us by the stars.

Somebody's at my shoulder, well, my hip. It's Jack. He's going to college with me, in Boston of all places, determined to find a way to make himself useful beyond jockeying. His racing days have been long over, ever since Shamrock, really, but like me he clung to his past in his own self-destructive way.

"You be good now. Don't terrorize Lilac and Mary while we're gone," Jack says warningly to BD.

As though offended, as though he would never do such a thing, BD snorts and pulls away from me. He tosses his mane, whirls around and races off, curling and leaping in a buck, his coat living fire under the sun. I press that image into my mind, of spirit and unpredictability and love, and feel ready.

As BD runs, leaning into the wind, I do the same and imagine I'm flying, reaching for what's yet to come. It's wonderful, it's unknown. Currents of air brush against my face and lend me the sensation of speed. Once more I am on BD's back, running and running and running. The entire world is open to me, on that horse's back.

And then I turn and walk with Jack away from the pasture, away from the horse that saved us all.

I have a life to live. 

*****

First of all, I want to thank my biggest supporters- DappledMoon equestrianismer clairee36 and Scout1324 for being there since the very beginning. You four have been rooting for Anna and BD since the first hoof hit the track and for that I will be forever grateful. ♡

As for all my other readers, thank you as well. I seriously appreciate every single word of support that Bloodless Day has accumulated over the year and twelve days it has been in writing. They mean the world to me.

I could go on and on and on, but it's the dragged on goodbyes that are the worst, so I'll keep this short and sweet.

Thank you. Seriously.

Love,

Alyx, Anna, BD, and the rest of the Piperson team