Breaking the Habit//Gratsu

23

"The misunderstanding of truth does not destroy the truth."

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Natsu's point of view:

I laid in bed for what seemed quite a while. The only time I got up was to pack my things and head back to Magnolia.

Here I was curled up in my bed surrounded by my comforter.

I felt as if I was forgetting something that was relatively important. The more I felt it, the more I brushed it off and the heavier it got. I tried thinking harder but that never turned out well. Then today's date caught up to me.

What was today anyway?

My phone was in my luggage and there was no way I was going to get up to retrieve it, however, that feeling came again. It was tugging my gut making me go to my bag. I wanted to go back to the sheets that provided me warmth and stay there longer. I knew I couldn't; I missed four days of class since I got back from the break and didn't go to the bookstore for my shift. I had to call my boss sometime before there was a chance of me losing my job.

No job meant no money and no money meant no drugs.

For now, I'm loaded with drugs to add to my stash but the way things have been, their finishing at a fast pace. My question is why haven't I died yet? It frustrates me to no end.

I'm too much of a coward to end my life quickly. If I did I would finally be free from myself and the world; more from myself. I'm tired of being a prisoner of my own mind.

The substances would take longer to kill me but I know that day will come. One push is all I need to be set free.

I held onto the power button turning on my phone that had been off all this time.

January ninth is the date that was displayed on my lock screen. I had a couple of unread messages and calls. They were completely from Gray but what did he want?

Gray: Text me if you'll be coming right before the fireworks so I could get us a good place to see them. -10:30 p.m

I paused on this particular text.

Fireworks?

Shit. Fucking shit.

I bit my lip gripping onto my phone. I totally forgot I was going to meet up with Gray.

I swear I was going to go.

I couldn't recall why I didn't go but I had a feeling I did it was the drugs.

Yeah, it was the drugs.

I brushed my teeth not bothering to shower and threw on my uniform heading out in a flash. I thought up of ways how I could explain to Gray why I couldn't make it.

It's as if I chose the drugs over him. It shouldn't matter anyways. I've been doing them for years so why care now? The drugs won't leave, people do.

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The bell had already rung for the first period and the entry ways were dead silent. Not until the sound of a locker slamming shut was heard. Seeing as I was already late for Mr. Neekis' English, I went over to that said locker that was around the corner.

There stood Gray.

I didn't know what to do. I could have silently turned around and act like I hadn't seen him or encounter him and get this done and over with. The former seemed like a better idea but the latter was more reasonable.