Hear Our Cry

Once upon a time... wait no scratch that.

South Central 2003

I heard the helicopters flying over head as usual as I played inside with my older brother, my mom came out her room with a cigarette hanging from her mouth and her robe open exposing her naked body.

"Girl get these damn toys up, my man don't want no dirty house." My mother said to me as she let out a big cloud of smoke and sitting on the couch.

I looked at my brother who rolled his eyes getting up.

"C'mon Nani." He said reaching for my hand, I reached up and took hold of his hand as he walked me to the kitchen

"Tottie, I hungry." I said looking up at him and he looked down at me hearing my stomach growl, I was 5 and he was 10. He looked around our empty kitchen as a cockroach crawled from under the counter, I closed my eyes knowing I didn't like the sight of bugs or the sight of them when Tottie killed them for me. I heard a slam and opened my eyes seeing he killed the bug.

"There's nothing to eat Ma!!" Tottie yelled after looking through every cabinet and drawer for food.

"Boy, there's something in there. Shut up." Our mother responded back. Tottie looked at me and sighed.

"I'll be back." He said and he started to walk away but I followed.

"Stay here Nani." he said looking back at me.

"No Tottie don't go, I scared." I said nervously gripping his shirt.

"I gotta get you food, just go in the room and play dolls, I'll be back."

I looked at him with my eyes full of tears and slowly let go of his shirt finger by finger, he kissed my head leaving out without our mother not even knowing or acknowledging his absence.

I walked pass my mother and looked back at the door.

"Come here lil' girl." She said putting out her cigarette. I walked over to my mother and she patted the couch spot next to her, I sat next to her on the faded dirty looking tan couch and she rubbed my thigh, I looked at her growing uncomfortable.

"You a cute lil thang, don't be growing up too fast, out here with these lil boys." She said squeezing my thigh a little bit and I nodded letting her know I understand her. She gave me a smile and kissed my lips, I didn't know that wasn't a mommy kiss, I felt her tongue slide into my mouth then she pulled away.

"Now get out of here." I got up walking away and she kicked me in the butt making me stumble almost falling over I went to my room closing the door and climbed onto Tottie's small bed next to the window looking down unto the street, in the distance I could hear the sound of gunshots, dogs barking and sirens, I heard a women screaming and saw three men run, then I looked over to the corner where women stood half dressed and men stood selling those bad things. Then. I saw Tottie, he was talking to Big G, I saw him say something he looked to be yelling, while Big G laughed at him and patted his head, Tottie looked mad, I saw him pulled something from his waistband and stab Big G over and over I gasped and screamed banging on the window as Big G fell and Tottie looked shocked, he stepped back and ran away.
Away from Big G
Away from there
Away from me

I sobbed, hearing,
the guns
sirens
women screams
helicopters
the three men running
the dogs

And I heard
the cries

I begged.

Someone,

Hear Our Cry.