Behind Closed Doors

Chapter 22

Previously:

There was a knock at my door and I figured it was Janie, but she didn't cone in right after knocking on the door. So I got up from the bed and walked over towards the door. I latched onto the knob and opened the door. My jaw dropped at the sight before me.

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"Please tell me that I'm dreaming right now." I whisper to myself.

"Hi Nia." she smiles.

I'm not dreaming.

"What are you doing here?" I question.

"I can't check up on you? You're my daughter."

"No, you can't check up on me. Stop acting like you care about me when I know you don't!"

"You know I care about you!" she protests.

"Since when?! It didn't seem like you cared about me when he was beating my ass for all of these years! If you cared about me you would've protected me from him every time he beat me!" I yell in her face.

Did she really just have the audacity to say that to me? She cares about me? Ha. Bitch please. Don't make me laugh. She needs to cut the bullshit and get away from me.

"I didn't know what to do!" she yells with tears forming in her eyes. "He t-told me if I ever tried to stop him he'll b-beat me too. I wasn't having that."

"You sound fucking ridiculous! I don't care if he would've beat you too! You should've been there by my side! I'm your fucking child! I'm supposed to come before him!" I scream.

I don't mean to sound so harsh but I just have so much hate for her. Who just sits there and watch their child almost get beat to death? If he would've beat her too all she had to do was leave him. It's not that hard.

"I-I know. I'm so sorry Nia. I'm so s-sorry for not being t-there for you." she cries.

"It's too late to say sorry now. So you can take that apology and shove it down your fucking throat. I don't need it and I most definitely don't need you in my life." I tell her. "Oh and remember what I told you at the hospital. I'm not coming home when I get out of here."

With that, I slam the door in her face and walk back over to the bed. I lay down and smile to myself. I feel so much better now that I got that off of my chest. I've been building up so much anger and hate for her, for a while.

I nearly killed myself because of her and my father. Why would I want to be around her when she's half of the reason why I wanted to kill myself? I don't want to be anywhere near one of them because it'll force me to cut again. And I don't want that. Right now.

I would love to cut but not right now. It'll only serve me more time in here and I'm not staying in here for extra time. I just want to get these three months over with and be with Dylan and Kai. Hell, these days ain't going by any faster for me.

Maybe for good behavior they'll be able to release me a month early. I sure as hell won't be complaining if they do. I'll get my stuff ready to go in a second. They don't have to tell me twice.

• • •

For lunch today I was served french fries, a hamburger and a cup of Coca Cola. The fries were good as hell but the hamburger, not so much. It was decent. I'm hungry, so I'm eating anything they give me. I can't pass up on food anymore.

After eating my lunch I walked over to the window and watched the people from down there. It was another nice day today. So I decided to take myself outside. I wanted to enjoy some sunlight.

When I made it outside I went over to the bench and sat down. I crossed my arms and closed my eyes as I let the wind blow in my face. My hair blew in the wind sending shivers down my spine. The feeling made me relax a little.

"Hey Nia." a familiar voice says from behind me. I turn around to find Colson making his way towards me.

"Hi." I smile. "Are you stalking me?"

He chuckles. "No. Why would you think that?"

"Because I swear every time I come outside you're outside. Don't you find that a little odd?"

He tilts his head to the side a little. "No. I mean, I like being outside. Especially during this time of weather." he says taking a seat next to me.

I just shrug and brush my hair out of my face. I don't know if I'm just being paranoid or what. Colson is still a little weird to me but I'll just have to keep my distance from him every once in a while.

"I heard that your mother came here today." he says. How the hell does he know that?

"Yeah she did." I speak slowly. "How'd you know that?"

"Like I've said before, I know things. There's eyes and ears everywhere."

"Alright. I'll just leave that at that."

"How did it go? If you don't mind me asking."

"It was horrible. She came to check up on me and tried to apologize but I didn't accept. I spazzed out on her and everything. I was just so frustrated with her."

"Would you ever forgive her?" Colson questions.

"As of right now? No. I'm not even sure if I should forgive her or not. But if I do it'll be twenty years from now. She doesn't need my forgiveness. And I sure as hell don't need her apology." I admit.

I don't need my mother anymore. I'm getting ready to graduate pretty soon, and she's least of my worries. I don't care for her, and she doesn't care for me.

I'm not going to try to rebuild a relationship with her because its pointless and a waste of my time. I meant every single word I said to her. I'm never coming back home, and she can forget claiming me as her daughter.

-hope you lovelies enjoyed this chapter!!

the next update will be up Friday or Saturday

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