Next Lifetime

Chapter 10

The next morning, I woke up in my room with a pounding headache. I didn't want to go home with Alex last night so the uber dropped her off first then took me to mine. My head was killing me so I closed my eyes to stop the room from spinning. I crawled out of bed and took a shower, getting out I felt a little better just with a dull headache and feeling a little hungry. I walked into the kitchen to see Bryan heating up a breakfast sandwich.

"I didn't know you were back"

I said to him as I reached into the cabinet and got out a poptart.

"Yeah got back last night. See you had a good night"

He says taking a bit out of his sandwich. He chews while looking at me with his eyes looking into me.

"It was cool, head hurts like a bitch but I'm good"

I said chuckling dryly as scenes from last night flashed in my head. I knew I had to tell my family about Mariah, I just didn't know how. I wanted to tell Bryan first then I guess make it down the line.

"Yo, can we talk B"

I said to him as he gobbled the rest of his fucking sandwich.

"Sure"

We walked into the living room side by side. I told him everything, the crush, to losing our virginities to one another up to present time. He listened intently, when it came to the part about Mariah his eyes watered a bit as he took the news in. We sat in silence as the wheels turned in his head.

"Wow, to think we would've had a little Namber running around here"

He says chuckling sadly as he pulled me in for a hug. That's when I broke down. He didn't judge as I cried into his shoulder. I pulled away after awhile wiping my face.

"Nick, it's obvious you still have feelings for Amber why not just end things with Alex so that nothing can get messy"?

"I find her attractive, but I don't think we are in the same place to be together. Alex is different, I just want to see how things go with her"

"While Amber waits on the side hoping you will choose her"?

I looked down in thought at what he said.

"You can't do that. You don't have the right to put Amber on a shelf and have her wait around while you get over everything. She is human. One day someone is going to slide in and take her heart and there will be nothing you can do about it. If you have feelings for Alex whole heartedly okay good but don't play games. If you love Amber and want to be with her then now is the time to do it."

His phone rings by then and he rubs his face in annoyance.

"Who is it"?

"Fucking Megan"

I laughed and walked away thinking of everything that he said. If I love Amber I should be with her and not playing games. The thing is there is Alex, she's different and I love her daughter. I can see Alex and I working out but will I fully have my whole heart in the relationship? She deserves all of me and not a piece of me. I walked in my room and sat on my bed thinking of everything. I thought of us when we were kids, all the great times we had. I thought of the first day I noticed that damn I loved her. We were in the fifth grade, we known each other since kindergarten. I was pushing her on the swing during recess wondering why I felt so nervous around her.

I always thought she was really pretty. She was wearing a flower dress with her hair separated in four squares braided with ballies at the end. She was giggling telling me about a Goosebumps book she was reading. She would often stay in the library reading them but I dragged her out this time wanting to play with her. Without old Ms. Berry shushing us. It was when she turned around and smiled at me as she laughed that everything froze literally.