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I want to meet the boys so bad but  the thought of being not able to speak in front of them scares the hell out of me. I wish I could go confidently in front of them and say what I am planing and imagining to tell to them from all these years, instead of melting and loosing myself in front of them. I wish I could hug them so that I could live with the embrace for the rest of my life.

I wish......... I always do.

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