The Nanny

Man To Man Conversation

I couldn't sleep.

All I could do was stare at my ceiling and try to think up some way I could convince the woman down the hall from me that I wasn't going to stop until she let me show her that we could be more than this odd arrangement we currently had.

I had let her have her small break for the night because I knew that pushing to much when she already felt like she was in a corner wouldn't be doing myself any favors, so instead I left her with something to think about.

It was clear to me, and I knew it was clear to her as well, that she craved me as much as I did her. The fact that she was ready to kiss me again before I left her was proof of that. Now I just had to convince her over analytical brain to let go, to let me in.

I glanced at the tele that had been on pointlessly since almost as soon as the power had come back on, not even the mind numbing adverts could make me fall asleep.

My mind was too full of the things that had happened today. Too full of the fantasies brought to life that had occurred.

Too full of Aria.

It was because I was wide awake thinking about the woman a few doors away from me that I heard the tiny cries.

It was so small, so quite at first that I wasn't sure I heard it as I pushed myself up out of bed, and then there it was again, stronger and louder.

I found myself climbing out of bed and padding across my bedroom towards where I knew the crying was coming from.

I slowly crept into the nursery, unsure if Aria was already up. It normally took her a few minutes, but seeing as I was already awake I had a feeling I had gotten here before she had even been pulled from her dreams.

Quietly glancing around the room I confirmed that Aria was still asleep and I intended to keep it that way.

Mostly because I needed her well rested and in a semi pleasant mood tomorrow before I hit her with my reasoning.

As soon as I reached the crib Jamie's wide tearful eyes glanced up at me, cries stopping as he watched me curiously before kicking his little cubby legs in impatience.

"I got you little man." I cooed quietly reaching down to pull the baby up into my arms before turning and stepping back into the rocking chair I lowered us into. Jamie's little fingers reaching up to touch my face as I hushed him quietly. "Let's not wake you're mummy, yeah?"

He just grinned sleepily at me, blinking his wide eyes and giggled.

It made something stir in me to hold him.

There was something about holding a baby, something about having something so small depend on you that made you feel invincible.

Darcy had long since passed the age where I could hold her like this, cradled to my chest with both my hands spanning her whole body. She was a 'big girl' as she like to point out to me, a fact that killed me a little more each day. She was meant to be my little girl forever.

As I looked down at Jamie, I almost wished Darcy was this age again. All and all it was nice to have a baby around.

And Jamie was certainly a wonderful child to have around. Aria was luck, but then again I think Jamie got just as luck with her.

"Shhh." I hushed letting one of his hands wrap around my finger as I did. "We need to keep quiet, let your mummy sleep because if she doesn't she won't be too happy in the morning, and Jamie let me just tell you what every man learns. If mummy is unhappy, everyone is unhappy."

Jamie giggled once more, now reaching up with the other hand to help hold the finger I was wagging around.

As I played with the infant my mind wandered back to his mum.