Fade to Black

Chapter 3: The Tragic Backstory

This always happens.
Every time I feel like I've finally got this under control, a vision hits me. This should've been expected,really. The vision always starts with my eyesight fading then, I hear the voices. The voices are quiet at first. They gradually get louder and louder until they are screaming. Echoing inside my head, Chasing out my own thoughts. I felt a burning pain behind my eyes as I was barely aware of myself falling to the ground. As the past invaded my mind, I faded out of reality.
                       ~~~
    The vision hit me like a brick. I was standing with a man and woman in front of a house. This person felt familiar. Like I've met him before. I was seeing the world through the eyes of a boy who was about 7. He (I?) was smiling like he didn't have a care in the world.  His father smiled proudly at him and started to say something then, the vision changed. I was still the same kid, but now I was about 12. I saw headlights blurring,heard someone scream ( His mother?) and next thing I knew I was in a hospital. I was sitting on the bed sobbing so hard I couldn't breathe. The Doctor stood in front of me, trying to console me. I only cried harder. The pain and misery was choking me. Suffocating me in my own hate.
        The vision changed again. I stood at a graveside, looking down at the freshly dug up earth. This time I only felt hate. Hate directed at myself. Survivors guilt, I guess. I threw down some roses as tears began to slide my cheeks. I looked up at the sky and screamed. As my voiced faded with the wind, a hand came down on my shoulder. "Evan? Lets get you back to the car." I just stood there. So thats who I am?  I thought This is Evan's past... No wonder the poor kid looks like he hates everyone. Its not everyone else he hates. It's himself. He blames himself for his parent's death, and can't forgive himself for living.  I turned to face the person behind me and felt a burning pain. This is how I knew the vision was almost over. I would soon wake up and not remember  something. I might even wake up and not remember who I am. I was slowly being pulled back to reality, back to the asylum. To the place I would be treated as though I was a danger to society. I guess you could say I'd rather stay in the past,trapped inside my own head. It's the only place I feel safe.
                        ~~~
         I woke with a start. It always scares me. Coming out of someone's memories and back into the real world is pretty disorienting. I slowly blinked my eyes open and saw someone sitting beside me. It was Evan. It felt weird,being near him after what I just saw. It was always awkward being around people after a memory.
"Did you hear anything I just said?" I realized he was talking to me. I really need to start paying attention. "Um...No?" I replied quietly . It was more of a question than a statement.
Evan rolled his eyes and blew air out of his mouth in annoyance. " What I said was, Never do something like that again. You hear me? I was really worried."
   What.
Did someone say they were actually worried about me? I never heard people say that. Most of the time people called me crazy, a freak. One time someone even called me the spawn of Satan. Like, yeah sure a scrawny, barely 5 foot tall kid from Montana  is the spawn of Satan himself. What did they think I was going to do? Blast them away with my Satan powers? No. The worst I could do  was yell some really crappy insults at them. I can't fight, the only I can do is run. Where to? I don't know. Home, I guess. Except I can't remember where I lived or what my house looks like, except for my room. Most of my life before age 10 is just blurred and faded. So, naturally I was taken aback when someone said they actually worried about me. " Yeah, um okay. I'll try to control the crazy." Easier said than done. Evan smiled slightly.
"Good. I'm not joking dude, what you did right there seriously freaked me out."
" Haha. Sorry, I can promise it won't be the last time it happens though."
"Why?"
"It's kinda the reason I'm here."
The conversation slowly faded out after that. We just sat there in awkward silence. Cassandra eventually came in and told me I was free to go. As I left the room Evan pulled me to the side and asked "What did you see when you blacked out? I heard you muttering something about being sorry." I just stared at him. Should I tell him? It would be weird not to. But I also didn't want to bring out the pain that was always under the surface. He looked at me like he expected an answer,so I told him.
"I-I saw you. Your parents, Evan I'm so sorr-" I was cut short by Evan pushing me away from him. " I don't need your apologies ." He growled " I don't want your sympathy. So just LEAVE ME ALONE." His voice had risen to a shrill volume, and now people were staring.
I turned to say something to Evan, but he was already sprinting in the other direction. " Great job Kyle." I muttered to myself " You managed to scare away yet another person."