Fix Me | Phan High School AU

Chapter Six

A/N: Hi guys! So first off I want to thank you all so much for all the reads I have been getting!

I feel like I'm going to try and focus on more of Dan being the kinda popular fboy in this chapter, I don't think I established it well enough in the past.

Phil's POV

I dropped my lunch tray on the table, unsurprised when the two girls at the other side of the table gave me a disgusted look and moved away. I didn't know them personally, but I remembered seeing them with Anthony and his friends a lot. Do they think I'm really that awful?

I was snapped out of my thoughts when a high-pitched giggle sounded from a few tabled over. I turned to the source of the noise. Dan was sitting at table with his friends and several other girls, all who were practically lusting over him.

I watched with disgust as one of the teenagers snaked her arm around his waist, leaning her head on his shoulder. I would never understand how guys could complain about girls being sluts when they were the ones they were being sluts with.

I watched out of the corner of my eye as of the girls grabbed his hand, pulling him out of the cafeteria.

Deciding I had lost my appetite, I got up to go throw away my tray.

"Hey." Lucas, a sandy-haired boy walked up to me, a sly grin plastered on his face.

I gave him a brief smile then continued walking.

"Hey fag, I'm talking to you!" He grabbed my arm, spinning my around.

"What the hell do you want?" I hissed.

He gave me a quick smile before reaching forward and flipping my tray. I stepped back in shock as the contents spilled all over me and the cafeteria burst into laughter. Lucas hurried back to his friends, all who greeted him with pats on the back and high-fives.

I turned towards the door, keeping my head down to hide the tears stinging my eyes. I didn't stop till I was out of the door and standing alone in the hallway. I looked down at my clothes. Chocolate milk, mashed potatoes, and gravy stained my shirt, small trails running down onto my pants.

In fear of running into someone else, I hurried off to the bathroom.

I was almost there when a supply closet door in front of me flew open. Dan and a girl stumbled out, both with messy hair and grins plastered to their face.

The blonde noticed me first, the disgust obvious in her expression.

I watched as Dan turned towards me and his smug look dissolved. His gaze drifted down my food-stained clothes, then back up to my eyes. "Phil—"

"Can we help you?" The girl spat.

Dan glanced away, shifting uncomfortably.

I hurriedly wiped the tears from my eyes. I wanted to make a witty remark, but there was nothing to say so instead I cast them both a dirty look then scurried into the bathroom.

...

I sat on the edge of my bed, staring glumly at the rope that laid in my hands.

"Did I really want to do this?" I questioned, running my fingers over the beige fibers. "Maybe I'm just being dramatic..." I started to set the object down, but other voices began to creep up in my mind.

"No one could ever love you.

Depressed.

Worthless.

Disgusting.

Ugly."

I let out a soft sob as a tear ran down my cheek, dripping onto the rope. Standing up, I stepped up on my chair, slipping the cord around the ceiling fan.

When I was sure it was tied securely, I took a step back. The sight looked eerie in the dimly lit room

I placed the brief note on my neatly made bed, wondering if my dad would even give a shit when he found me.

Ping

I turned to my laptop with confusion. A Facebook messenger alert had popped up on the screen.

Did someone actually text me?

I walked over to my desk, pulling up Facebook and going to my DMs.

Dan Howell (1) 6:45 pm

"Hey"

I stared at the screen for a moment.

What the fuck.

Opening the chat, I quickly responded.

You: hi?

Dan: i know your probaly mad at me, and I get it, im an asshole

Dan: but I'm drunk rn and I really need to say Im sorry

I looked down at my computer screen, reading over Dan's text several times.

You: What are you apologizing for? Do you think I care if you make out with some random girl in the supply closet? It's not like we're close friends or anything. Why are you even nice to me in the first place? Just leave me alone

Dan: But I dotn want to leave you alone

You: why

Dan: I like you. You're real

I stared at my screen, dumbfounded.

You: what?

Dan: I gor to go now

You: Whatever, bye

I groaned, leaning back in my chair and staring at the reflection of the hanging noose in my window. I wasn't sure whether I should be relieved or frustrated that Dan texted me before I could get my death over with.

I had so many mixed feelings when it came to Dan. I wanted to hate him—that would make things so much easier—but I didn't. As much as he got on my nerves and played with my feelings, I couldn't bring myself to.

With a sigh, I got up and undid the rope, coiling it around my hand then shoving it back under the bed.

Today wasn't the day.

A/N: SO hopefully that was not horrible, I think some parts of it could have been better, but it didn't complete suck (except for that last paragraph, ew). I think I might update my oneshots soon, so look out for that!