Fix Me | Phan High School AU

Chapter Ten

A/N: I hope you don't mind that I kind of skip a lot of time in this chapter, I just thought that I'd spare you the boring details of class or Dan getting dressed.

Dan's POV

I lay on my back, staring up at the celling. The party had reached its climax a few hours ago and most of the people had left. The blonde girl who's name I didn't care to learn was fast asleep beside me, her top carelessly hanging on the bedpost.

Usually at this point I would be quite relaxed, but now all I felt was restless and filthy.

I shifted on the mattress, running a hand through my hair. What the hell was wrong with me?

"Once you have a taste of real love, you can never go back."

A quote from a book I once read crept into my mind. I groaned, rubbing my eyes. Why the fuck was everything so complicated?

After another hour of lying in bed and mulling over my thoughts, I got up and hastily pulled on my clothes.

I was still a bit tipsy as I stumbled through the empty streets on my way home. The hazy thought of how easy a target I was right now crossed my mind, but I was too tired to care.

Thankfully, I made it home with no trouble. The key was in the planter like it always was and I quietly made my way up to my room.

...

I woke up feeling like shit.

My hangover wasn't at its worse, but I still had a throbbing headache for the first half of the day.

For the first time in my life, I was almost thankful for the pounding against my skull—it was a pain in the ass but at least it distracted me from thinking too much about Phil.

I knew I had hurt him. I had hurt him horribly. The guilt sat heavily in my stomach, like a massive wad of clay or dough that my body couldn't digest.

My nerves were like violin strings as I walked to third period. I felt that even the slightest pressure on me right now would cause me to snap.

I hadn't seen Phil in the hall today. I couldn't tell if that was a good or a bad thing. On one hand, I hadn't had to deal with he consequences that faced me yet, but I also had no idea what condition he was in or what to expect from him.

My eyes went straight to Phil's seat when I stepped in the classroom. I expected to see him hunched over his desk, bad posture as usual. Maybe his eyes would be red from crying. His hair more matted down than usual and his clothes even darker.

The chair was empty.

Somehow, I hadn't expected him to not show up, and the lack of Phil was more jarring than anything. A sense of panic (! at the Disco) rose within me. It was surely just a coincidence... I mean, it had to be... he was sick... or maybe he stayed up late thinking about what I said and didn't have the energy to... or he just didn't want to see me...

I could feel the reality of what I had said beginning to sink in.

He'll be okay. He must be.

...

The minute fourth period got out, I rushed to the cafeteria. If anyone would know what was up with Phil, it would be Kevin, his neighbor.

I hurried over to the boy's table, any thoughts of lunch had left my mind.

"Kevin!" I called out, causing the boy to jump slightly.

Kevin was very nerdy and kind of a loser. He had been a pretty easy target for bullying when he was younger, but then he started doing everyone's homework for them and he pretty much got left alone. He was cool enough. A little weird, sure, but nice.