Nothing Left

Chapter Twenty-three

March 1, 1972 12:03 p.m.
I rolled down the hallway in a wheelchair, the rubber-coated wheels pressing into the soft carpet. I clutch a tape in my hand, but I don't remember where I'm going. I suddenly turn towards a room, then carefully open the door. But as I push open the door, I suddenly see things. I gasp and clutch my head in my hands. Then everything disappears...I see a smashed car...I hear myself yelling, but I can't make it out. After a few seconds, my throat is raw from yelling. I realize I was screaming for my mom...my mom...I see a man hitting me, and he yells at me...

"Raymond! Never come back!" he shouts, his voice carrying over rain. I find myself yelling back.

"I'll never come back! I don't need you! You hear me? I DON'T NEED YOU!" I suddenly see that this man is my dad. I see a courtroom, a judge's gavel ending a case. The word 'divorce' echoes through my head. I then see a dark room, and a...a girl. Her name is Esther May Kennedy. My name is Raymond Daikon....I then see a police officer ramming a car into a field...I scream for him to stop, and pain shoots through my back...I open my eyes in the hospital, and suddenly remember everything.

I do a quick check in my head. My mom is dead from a car accident. My father is dead. Also from a car accident. I know a creepy police officer who doesn't fit anywhere in the puzzle. I know a girl named Esther, who likes band music. I look at the tape in my hand, and at the room number on the door.

"Please help me, Lord." I pray as I roll myself into Esther's room. I feel my blood run cold. She is laying on the bed, a tube in her throat, a heart monitor zig-zagging, her hair splayed out over the white sheets. I choke back a sob. "Please let her live, Lord." I whisper to myself.

I then get an idea. I roll my wheelchair next tto her bed and press the tape into a tape player next to the bed. I press the play button, and Who Am I by Casting Crowns floats around the room. I grasp Esther's hand and press it to my cheek. Then my lips. I suddenly fall in love with the girl who is nothing. I hear sheets crackle and look up at her fluttering eyelashes.