who am I (a roller coaster ride) #wattys2016

Chapter Sixteen

Despite how it may seem, I do not see the world as an ugly stream. Yes I admit, that sometimes, the thought of 'injustice in my life' conquers my mind, but I do my best to drive it away as soon as it came. Because, all my life, I was accustomed to feeling like a victim, instead of trying to solve the problems that littered my path. I'd see the obstacles lying in a big pile, blocking my way and complain about them, rather than try to move them. I had my own little shell that I chose to remain in. While it was just a way to ignore facing the world, I found calmness and lack of disappointment in that way of life, because I believed that I was a being, cursed by the world to remain unhappy. So, that was what I did, I remained unhappy.

That was until I stumbled upon a hospital on my way home from school, when I was thirteen. I was visiting a sick friend from school, at the time. As soon as I entered through the doors, my feet led the way throughout a carpet-clad reception until I reached a white opaque door. Hesitantly, I willed myself to enter the room, whose smell made my stomach quiver and colours, of white and black, made me confused. That was the first time I saw a hospital, that wasn't pink and wasn't in a story book - my mum never really exposed me to the world that lies beyond the walls of our house. My eyes, twitching from the fluorescent lamps, fell on a fragile figure. As I got closer, I noticed her face. She was a girl, but on her head, where there should normally be hair, was nothing. My first instinct was to run, after all, I was a creature of habit, who rejected the unfamiliar. But before I can flee the room, the girl looked my way and - smiled brightly. I could've sworn that I did not have control of my legs as they guided me towards her, it was as if a force was drawing me to her. Yet, before I could get too close, I was spotted by a nurse, who shooed me away and out of the door. I never saw that girl again. I never even knew her name. I could never thank her. For the first time, in a long time, when I looked in the mirror of my room, I could see my lips twisting upwards, with no effort. I remember thinking that if she can laugh, while living this way, then so can I.  

Shortly afterwards, I took the decision to leave them, to  grant them the chance of a better life. I knew I was strong enough to bare the loneliness and powerful to acquire my smile, thanks to that girl.

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I woke up feeling like I got hit by a bus. Glancing over to the clock on my bedside, and scanning the number, I realized that I have slept for over fourteen hours, which is hard to believe due to my insistent train of yawns that refuse to calm down. A loud grumble soon escaped my stomach after a smell of fried eggs attacked my nostrils. I willed myself to get up, so that I can quite it down.

Opening my bedroom door, I was surprised to see a figure in our make-shift dorm kitchen. The sun rays occupied the room, brightening it and making the baby blue colour of the walls shine. I sat down on the small island centering the room and cleared my throat slowly to gain his attention. I knew it was Adam. I remembered everything from yesterday and I was still contemplating what to tell him. Any normal person in the world would ask about such a horrifying event. My nightmares were never that vivid though, this was the first time.

"Okay, we are getting straight to the point. None of that did-you-sleep-well casual morning talk, alright?" He addressed me all of a sudden, after turning away from the stove and swiftly placing a plate of fried eggs in front of me.

I nodded slowly, anticipating the storm, while taking a small bite out of my plate.

"Now, I just need to know one thing and I promise I will only ask this once." He stared at me seriously and with much emotion.

Here it comes. Here it comes.

"What do you think of the eggs?"He questioned, still holding the same expression.