Growing up as Transgender in Upstate New York (MtF)

Ya Someone New

                 Well summer has ended and 10th grade is starting very fast. As I looked closer to the new year of school I saw this new girl move into my Mobile home park that I was live at.  After about 2 weeks of walking past her place and seeing her out side I decided to stop and say high to here. As I walk into the yard the 5'4" girls with long brown hair turns around and I stopped dead in my tracks. "Hello my name is Amanda" is all I hear from her. After about 1-2 min I told her my name and where it was I lived in the park. As we talk to get to know each other better over the weeks. After school started my and Amanda where real close. like all way's at each others houses close. As halloween came around we talked about what to wear wile we just walked around the park scaring kids. That's when I took the opertunaty to tell her " I really would like to go out as  a girl for once" And with that she agreed and we went shopping for clothes to fit me. After shopping I asked her if I could keep the clothes at her house tell we went out. With out asking why she had no problem with that. As Halloween came closer we talked about meeting right after school at her place ordering a pizza and getting ready. We also desided that we where going to go around once then go back and watch some movies for the rest of the night. Well the night finally came as we got off the bus I her that I would be right there just wanted to drop my bag off at home. After I walked in the door and droped y bag off I told my mom I'll be back late tonight im going to a friends house and we where getting pizza and watching some movies.  I got to Amanda's house just as the pizza got there we ate and we got ready with makeup and everything. I looked at my self in the marror and I couldn't believe what I saw. "Whats wrong di I put to much one or not enough" I heard my friend ask me. I looked over to her and I just hugged her.  "what was that for all I did was dress you up" she said I jus looked at here and I told her that when we get back we need to talk that there was things she needed to know. She nodded and we head out the door ready to scear some kids. The night was going great as we walked around and jumped out to make the kids scream and then we came up to my house. Shes like why don't we stop I want to meet your folks and with out thinking I lead her to the door. Right before I could open the door I got scard and stared to walk away pulling here saying I changed my mind plz lets go. Just as we where going down the stairs the door opened " I'm sorry but aren't you a little old to be out getting candie" And I know my step dad saw us. I turned around " Don this is my friend Amanda Amanda this is my step dad Don" they both shook hands and talked for about 5 min before they said byes. "When you get home we are going to talk" I heard my step dad say as we started to leave the drive way. After we got back to her house I started to change and she stopped me. "What was that all about why did you change your mind about me seeing your folks?" She was asking me. I stopped un dressing and sat down. She sat right next to me hold my hand looking at me "Plz Eric tell me im your friend you can trust me"  I yook a big deep breath and told her this dose not leave the room. Before I said anything she got up and closed her bed room door. I looked at her as she sat down and I told her everything from my Step dad beating me to the part I have alwas wanted to be a girl. "So that's why you hung and thanked me before going out" she asks. I just nod  then looked at her and said "if I go home he well proble kill me gor this because my folks do not want me doing this." On that note she got up walked out the door and was talking to her mom. After about 15 min her and her mom came into the room "you are welcome to stay here tonight " I thanked her mom as I was still dressed as a girl. After her mom left the room she apologized to me for telling her mom but she would rather know i'm safe tonight. That night we stayed up talking and I still yet to have changed out of my clothes for bed And that's the night she found out about me likeing this one guy and all my sercrets and yet still Accepted me.

              The next morning I got up and changed into my reg cloths and washed all the makeup off. I asjed to leave the clothes there tell this blows over and thanked my friend and her mom for letting me stay before heading home. After I walked in the door I saw my step dad sitting in the chair waiting for me. "Before you say anything I just want to let you know it was hallween and its a night for everyone to dress anyway they want." Is all I said to him but that wasn't good enough " I don't care if its hallween or not you have no reason to dress that way after we told you not to" you could tell hes getting up set now. "im sorry but my friend and I just wanted to have fun this year is that so wrong?" I asked him and that sent him over the edge. Right after I said that I saw how pissed he was and then he started to get up. That's when I knew I better leave or I was going to get beat. In a split second I got up and bolted out the door and down the road right back to my friends house witch I was glad they didn't know where it was. As I got to my friends house I saw they where getting ready to leave and luckly they saw me and saw I was running and asked if I wanted to go out with them. I didn't even think twice I jumped in the back seat and we headed to the front of the park. Right as we rounded the corner to the entrance there was my step dad in his car and it looked like he was driving around looking for me. While out I told my friend and her mom what happened After we talked and spent some time out they asked if I wanted to stay one more night I declined and told them that I well have to face him sooner or later. So we made or way back to the park and I asked them to drop my off at the front of the park incase he was still driving around and wouldn't know where they live. After they droped me off and we parted ways I made my way back to the house to face the music. As I got closer to the house I saw that his car was gone so I ran fast into the house and hid in my room and acted like I was there a while for when he did show back up. About 2 hours after I got back he walks in the door still pissed off and sees me in my room doing home work. I knew he was Knew he was home but I didn't want to make eye contact. So I just stayed barried in my home work and the next thing I know I was on the floor. As I go to get up I get pushed right back down I look up to see whats going to and there he is above me getting his belt off to hit me with. After he gets it off I am finally able to sit up and as I go to stand I feel it hit my back side. " this is for wearing those clothes " He says as he hits my back with the belt. That gose on for about 10-15 min before he gets tired of hitting me with his belt and right as I belive he is leaveing I get back handed across the face. After I notice that he has left the room I get up trying to hold back tears as I pick my chair and home work up so I can finish it.  A couple of days later im headed back to school my face is still black and blue as I meet my friend at the bus stop. She looks at me and I let her know what happened but I told her don't bother telling anyone it well make it worse. We went the rest of the day as if nothen has happened and I liked it.