Growing up as Transgender in Upstate New York (MtF)

The whole new me

           After meeting with the doctor more and getting more cumfortable with the tearm TRANSGENDER we decided to go out for a dinner to celabrate. We went to my fav resteront to eat and while we are eating we starting talking about names that would best suit me and ones I liked. after alot of names I came up wit Amy Marie and she loved it. After the next doctor visit the doctor told me its about time I tell my family and friends So thats waht I did. I called up tracy and told her I have some news to plz come over and to my surprise she came over within the hr. That when I told Trace that I was transgender and I am going to start the prosses to being a female We told her the name and everything. Tracy came right up to me saying how happy she is for me and that shes proude of me for finally being my self. A couple days after telling her I got ahold of Tia and told her im comeing over to plz be home I really need to talk to her. I was abit nervius when i pulled into her driveway to drop the bomb shell of news. After nicole and I park we meet my sister and have her come out side and we all sit around the table. "So whats this big news and plz dont tell me shes pregnet" Tia says to us we laugh and tell her no its bigger then that. She got a surprise look on her face when we said that. " You reamber how id alwas dress up and youd call me Erica and your little sis and all" I ask her and she nods. "Well I am TRANSENDER and a lesbian meaning i was born male and i feel like a female in side wanting to come out" I tell her She stands up and walks over to me and hugs me "Well its about god dam time you came out We thought you where gay or at least bi but this says it all" I ooked at her shocked "You knew and yet you did not say anything." I say to her. "well when you triend to hide the fact you where wearing the clothes around mom and done it was very oviouse" I just put my head done and sigh a big relife. "Well that was one thing I wanted to talk to you about I need your help with mom and the rest of the family" I tell her. "Dont worry about the rest of the family I got them and as for mom well get her here friday after work and we well tell her togeather" My sister says to me. With that we hug and we head home to make a face book page for the all new me. Well my sister held her end of the bargon everyone in the family got ahold of me on face book saying that it was about time I came out and that they where happy for me. Friday cam faster then I thougth it would and Nicole and I head back over to my sisters to get ready to tell my mom.  20 min after getting there my mom shows up and after she parks and gets out of her car we call her over to us telling her we had big news. Sure enough she thought the same thing Tia did about being pregnet the three of us laugh and tell her know. "Mom you know how you alwas wanted three doughters right" Tia askes her and my mom slowly nods her head "well mom I have been seeing a doctor for over a month now and we have come to tearms that I am transgender" I tell my mom "Ok so what do we call you know Erica or what and what now your going to wear dresses and everything like that" My mom say I tell her no Erica its Amy and yes thats the point of being transgender I can wear those things and feel good about my self. With that my mom GOse ok will i need to go home now thanks for tell me and she get in her car and leaves. 2 weeks go bye and I dont hear anything from my mom so we go over to her house and she wasnt home but don was. Before we could get in the car to leave he stops me and says that him and I need to talk. "I under stand You told your mom that you want to me a female now" He start up" What ever that fine you are on your own you have a house wit noe morgiage but you need to under stand your mom now is trying to figure out where she went wrong with you so dont expect her to just start talking to you right away. Also you can come here wear what ever you like but when it comes to my family u have to dress in guys cloths they are veryold fashened." He tell me adn we talk some more and then I tell him I have to leave we are going out to shop with that He pulls me in and hugs me "I love you man and no matter what youll still be my kid" he says and lets me go.I get to the car and start to cry don has never ever told me the beofre and its said it took me doing this for him to say it.

          Nicole and I leave and go do our shoping for new clothes for meand shoes and a purse. Christmas is coming up and I hint to Nicole who at this point is now my feince that I would like to be asked my self and have a very girly moment. She acts like she didnt hear me and we go shopping for a new dress and bra for me becouse a christmas party is comeing up with her friends and I wanted to show them the new me.  The day of the party comes and Tracy comes over to help do makeup and hair on me as I get dressed up in my dress and everything. I admit I was very nurvis becouse her friends have never seen me dressed up before comeing out to them.after makeup and hair is done and its time to go we jump into my car and drive up to meet them for a party. The party is a blast and everyone is very kind to me and supportive and when I dont eat they come over and tell me to get my skinny ass up for food. As the night gose on we play a grab bag game where we have a bag of wine in front of us and I keep hiding it so no one can take it. well nicole gets one last turn and as she gets up ther she starts to do a speach about how she want able to get me a gift and she want me to meet her up in front of everyone. When she called my name I froze It took a friend of hers kicking my foot. I stood up and waled to her in front of all her friends and thats when her friend trish handed he a box and she got done one one knee and proposed to me in front of everyone. I was speachless and I was bluching all I could do was cover my face and nod my head yes. after she got up and we kissed and went back to our seats and at that point the party shifed to us. So here I am thinking to my self the girl I loved has Embrased me and has been helping me on my Jurny to being my true self and behappy just asked me in front of everyone that she cares about to marry me. I am in heaven I think to my self as I show off the ring to everyone.

               After the party we grab our mine and head home all happy and in a great mood. 3 days later tracy comes over after hearing the good news to give hugs and to congrdulate us. As febuary hits I make a doctors appontment to talk the transtion to net next step. AS I meet with her we talk about diffrent kid of horamons replacement therpe to get the one that suits me best. Afer talking for an hour we came up with one and she writes me a Script for them. So hear I am not even a year after comeing out and I am starting horamones. after the first three visits she says everything is going great and bumps me up to the max I am allowed to get. As summer comes to and end things start to get tought for us and the hosue and we make the bigist decsion we have ever made and that was to move and not just any wears we where thinking of moveing south. After alot of talk we decided to take a weekend and go down to north carolina to visit and see whats is like and if we like it. Before we go I get a two pice bathen suite witch is a very big step for me and we pack for the weekend and head out for the 12 hour car ride. After the 14 hours we make it down we grab a hotel room and go to see the ocean at night.after getting there and seeing the lovly view we decide to go eat and go back to the beach in the morning. As morning comes i shower shave and get into my very first 2 pice to go swiming in the ocean to the very first time. I throw a pair of jean shorts and a shirt on and we head out the door. Wehn we get to the beach we find a place to lay our stuff down and I take off my shirt reviling my top to go swiming.We swim for 3 hours with no proplems from anyone and we decide its time to eat so we pack up and head back to the room. As the weekend came to an end we decided that we wanted to move and we met a guy about the house we where looking at. After looking at it we said well take it and went back to New York to say bbye to everyone and to grab our stuff. 

                   Here we are no Liveing in North Carolina and starting our new lifes togeather as Amy and Nicole and I tell you I never thought I could ever be this happ in my life. Next step is marrage and I see a wedding gown in my feature.

                                                                                   THE END