16 & pregnant

5•

*Bethany's P.O.V*

What screws us up the most, is the fact that we picture how we want our lives to be. We know it'll never happen, but yet we still have a little bits of hope that it will. So when it doesn't, we're disappointed.

Vomiting and dizziness every morning. Not bacon and pancakes. It's sad too because, we always end up blaming ourselves for this perfect picture we plan in our heads. Only because, we know that it'll always be that perfect picture we plan on our heads. It'll never be reality.

I check my calendar. Twelve days late. I grab the paper bag and took at what's inside. My hands trembled as I look at this life changing object. "Bethany?" Someone opened the bathroom door. I put the object behind my back and looked at who walked in.

"You've been in here for fifteen minutes, I wanted to see if you're okay." Alisa weakly smiled at me. "Yeah." I whispered. A tear slowly made its way down my cheek. She immediately ran up to me and hugged me.

"What's going on babe? You can tell me." I sniffle and handed her the object. She lightly gasped. "Beth don't tell me you're-" I began quietly sobbing. "I don't know, that's why I bought it and-" I put my head down as the tears ran down my cheek. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for it to happen, I promise-"

She shushed me. "Hey. Don't apologize." She wiped my tears. "Take the test, we'll see for sure." She handed me the test. "And if you are, then I promise you, I'll be by your side." She caressed my face. I nodded my head and went to take the test.

She waited for me outside the bathroom. When I was done, I had to wait those deadly two minutes. I began to think what my life would be like with a baby. Waking up the morning, getting teased for my belly, getting fat! I run my fingers through my hair. I can't have a baby. It'll mess up my plans, my future, all the goals I planned.

*Ding Ding*

The timer went of in my phone. This is it. This little stick is going to determine my whole future. I take a deep breath as I turn the test around. My entire world just collapsed. I look at the little pink plus, looking at it mocking me. The tears finally escaped. I sniffled and heard the door open.

Alisa saw the look on my face and immediately ran to me. "Bethany." She wiped the tears from my cheeks. "I'm sorry babe. I'm so sorry." She whispered pulling me into a hug. She stroked my hair and shushed me. "It'll be fine babe, it'll be fine."
                          
                                  * * *

The next day was Thursday, so it meant I had to go to school. My eyes were still puffy since I was crying all night. I looked in the mirror and wiped the tear threatening to fall. I wore leggings, tank top, cardigan, and sneakers. I grabbed my book bag and began making my way to the bus.

As the bus doors open I wipe my face and sniffed. I can't make anything obvious to Holly. I walked in the bus and smiled when I saw Holly. She smiled back at me, as I made my way to where she was. I sat down and her smile faded. Oh no. "Bethany, have you been crying?" She grabbed my hand.

"No, why-why would you say that?" I slightly stuttered. "You're stuttering." I felt my eyes beginning to water and my nose began to run. "Bethany?" I looked down at my thighs and began silently sobbing. "What's wrong?" She whispered while caressing my face.

"I can't. You're going to be so disappointed in me." I looked up at her. "It can't be that bad." She tuck a piece of my hair behind my ear. "It's horrible. One of the biggest mistakes I ever made." I wiped my nose. "There's always a solution, baby." I laughed. "That's funny because there's no solution to pregnancy."