Josh Dun Imagines

So... What Now?

A/N: Thank you so much to anyone was has read my fanfic, faved it, or has followed me! It means a lot that someone likes what I write :) I hope you like this one. 

   Josh had been touring with Tyler for 3 months now and it was taking a toll on your relationship with him. When he left you assured him that you would be okay, but you really weren't. I mean, you had been dating Josh for over a year now and lived in an apartment together... of course you would be really sad without him there with you. Nothing was the same anymore. You were lonely, it was always way too quiet, you didn't have anyone to really talk to, and the bed was cold... It was like you were single again. You didn't have anything or anyone to look forward to anymore. He promised that he would FaceTime and call you everyday but eventually they got so busy that he just couldn't make any time to do anything else besides practice and perform. This made you feel so unimportant and sometimes you couldn't help but question if he had forgotten all about you. What if being on the road made him realize that he wants to move on from you or that he could do better? It was all too much for you, but at the same time it wasn't enough. None of it made sense to you but you just went along with it. You missed Josh. Every other day he would maybe shoot you a text or talk to you on the phone for a few minutes but then he always had to go. He always had to leave. It was a constant cycle of just wondering and waiting. This wasn't really what you wanted in a relationship, but you had to make it work. You really did love Josh and he loved you but things were starting to change. You hadn't even physically seen his face in 3 months or had hugged him or laughed with him. You decided that you would FaceTime him and tell him how you were feeling. It wasn't the plan to break up with him or get in a fight or anything like that... just talk. 

   It was currently 10 o'clock at night for you and he was one hour behind you, so he should be on the tour bus right now and should have enough time to talk with you. What if he broke up with you? What if he didn't answer? What if he didn't want to talk about it? What if he got mad? What if...? You shook the negative thoughts out of your head and just FaceTimed his phone. Josh immediately answered surprisingly, he was sitting on the couch in his bus. His face lit up when he saw yours and you realized how much you missed his smile. You said in a weak tired voice, "Hey baby. How are you?" Josh looked so happy, "Hey! I'm doing good. I miss you a lot, but the concerts are going great. Tyler and I literally just finished a crazy show about 45 minutes ago and we're back on the bus. I feel like I haven't seen you in forever! How are you?" Just the way he talked to you wasn't personal or intimate anymore. He always was a lot more open and casual with you, now he was talking like he was forced to have a conversation with his grandma. You didn't like it at all. You were sad but you put on a small fake smile for him, "Oh that's great. I'm glad you're having fun and that everything is going good. Where's Tyler?" Josh's smile faded slowly, "You didn't answer my question, Y/N. How are you? Why did you FaceTime me? Be honest with me." You doubted whether or not you wanted to tell the truth. You guys never lied to each other but you didn't want him to feel guilty. It just seemed like he wasn't feeling as down as you and that he didn't miss you as much as you missed him. Not that you wanted him to feel sad, it's just that you didn't expect him to be this happy without you with him. There you were, all alone in your cold apartment being all depressed while he's touring the world playing music to hundreds of people every night with his best friend. He deserved it... but you deserved better than what you were going through right now. You sighed, "Fine. Just please don't be mad." He looked really worried, "I promise that I won't. No matter what, you can tell me anything." Now he was back to talking like how he used to talk with you. Sweet and caring. You continued, "Okay... I'm going to hold you up on that. Um, I just wanted to talk with you. It's just that I miss you a lot. I love you so much and I'm so lonely and sad without you here with me. I know that you're living the dream and I want you to be able to continue and be happy because you work so hard and deserve this, but you know... I just wish there was another way. I'm not okay. We're drifting apart and we hardly talk anymore. It's not even a long distance relationship, I feel like I'm single and all alone again. I don't know. I don't want to ruin your night or make you feel bad, that's not my intention at all. I just wanted you to know how I've really been feeling. I'm constantly sad and I cry myself to sleep every single night because I'm not used to being all alone. It's already been 3 months. I feel like you've forgotten all about me and you've moved on." Josh looked so hurt and disappointed, "I see. I'm so sorry that you have been feeling this way. It's not easy on me either, though. It's not like I had a choice. I either gave up my dream that I've had ever since being a kid or I stayed home with my girlfriend and give up everything I worked so hard for. That would've disappointed me, my parents, my fans, Tyler... I would've brought you on tour with us if it was an option, but it wasn't. You knew that this would happen eventually, Y/N. I can't do anything about this, I'm on the other side of the world. By the way, no I haven't forgotten about you or moved on. I'm constantly busy. This is my career." He sounded mad and upset and that really scared you. Josh was rarely mad but when he was, it wasn't hard to tell. Why would he be mad, though? You had every right to be upset but he didn't. You weren't being mean about it, you were being honest. This was a really uncomfortable situation for the both of you, he kind of just wanted to get off the phone. You carefully and sadly continued, "Okay, so there's an issue here. For the both of us. This isn't easy at all and this is ruining our relationship. I'm just completely empty. So... what now? Are we over?" Josh scoffed and there were tears in his eyes, "Yeah. I guess this is the end. I hope you're happy, I'll miss you." And he hung up the call... What just happened? You didn't seriously think that you two would end up breaking up. How could he end everything so easily? It was really over.