Entertainment, Ideas, and Random Stories!!!

Random Joke Page (With Quite a Few Riddles) *Clean*

Blonde Jokes:

1) A blonde helped out with a boy's football team for school. She was the only girl allowed over there, since she would fetch them water and towels. One night during game, a brunette walked over towards the football teams' bench. The blonde walked up to her before she could reach the bench.

"Who do you think you are? Only men are allowed over here, duh!"

"I'm Amanda."

"Oh. Sorry, I didn't know." The blonde said, looking embarrassed. She moved out of the brunette's way and allowed her passage. When the brunette walked up to the football players and started flirting with the guys on the bench, the coach called the blonde over to him.

"Why aren't you doing your job?" The coach yelled at her. "I don't need my boys getting distracted and losing the championship game! Your job was simple. Get them water or towels when they need them, and KEEP GIRLS AWAY!!!"

"But coach, he only LOOKS like a girl, but really, he's a guy. He even said so himself."

"What?" The coach asked, confused.

"Like, I know right? I told him only men were allowed over there, and he was all like 'I'm a man, duh'!"

2) Football finally makes sense!!!

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. To start the game, the referees flipped a coin. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.

"Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and

all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the

rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!"

3) A red head, brunette and blonde are ship-wrecked on an island. They are captured by a tribe who says they will spare their lives and let them go if they can swallow 10 of one fruit whole without choking or laughing. They all agree, and go off in search of fruit.

The redhead comes back with ten small apples. She swallows the first, then second, before choking on the third.

The brunette comes back with ten small berries. She easily swallows them, but before she can swallow the last one, she starts laughing.

"Why did you start laughing?!" The tribe leader asked. "You could have been spared!"

"I just couldn't help it! I saw my blonde friend coming back with ten pineapples!!!"

Clean Religious Jokes:

4) A young boy had just gotten his driver's permit and asked his father if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he'd make a deal with him. "You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we'll talk about the car." The boy thought about that for a moment decided he'd

settle for the offer and they agreed on it. After about six weeks his father said, "Son, I've been real proud. You brought your grades up and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'm real disappointed you haven't gotten your hair cut."

The young man paused a moment then said, "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair and there's even a strong argument that Jesus had long hair."