I Even Funnier: A Middle School Story

guess what I saw this morning?

As I'm heading up the sidewalk on my way to school I see this really big really green garbage truck grinding it's way through something much worse than my aunts oat gruel. Were talking mushy juicy slop slimmer than the food scraps and sour milk sloshing around in rhe plate scrapers barrel at my middle schools cafeteria.
And I start thinking about adding this to my comedy act...
If long beach wants a big green monster to gobble up its garbage they should hire godzilla. I hear they kicked the big guy out of Japan.
Something to do with him yanking the tops off too many Tokyo skyscrapers and munching on them like they were nestle crunch bars. I think godzilla ate ate a few Subway sándwiches too. The kind made out of real subway cars.
If godzilla moved to long Beach he could stomp on down the streets scooping up and emptying out dumpsters. Even with his monstrous screeches he'd be quieter than the guys who usually show up on our street at 6 am to do drum solos on everybody's trash cans. Thanks to the garbage men. Nobody on our block needs an alarm clock.of course if godzilla did move to long Beach every time he went to say an all you can eat buffet a dozen waiters would probably dissappear.
And you know what you'd find between godzilla's toes?
Slow rumors. (Sorry I couldn't resist that one.)
When I meet up with Gilda Gold at the end of the block I tell her my godzilla the garbage man idea.
She laughs and whips out her iPhone.
"That would make an awesome short" she says starting to record. "We just shoot the garbage truck chewing up trash but dub in monster movie music and really loud sound effects".
"And voices" i say. "Make em sound like they're coming from people buried underneath the garbage. 'Help meeeee!'"
Gilda laughs.
I smile.
Gilda has a really cool laugh. A whole room can be cracking up but you'll always hear her amazing giggling ripping through it all. It's the kind of laugh that makes a kid want to keep on telling jokes for the rest of his life just so he can keep hearing it.
Yep. Gildas laugh ISS one of the reasons I want to be armll stand up cómic more than anything in in the world-- even if I idont exactly fit the job description.