Taraji And Terrence: The Secret

Losing Her Mind..

Taraji POV

The next morning i woke up better than before. I got out of terrences grip, can't believe he touched me...what i really needed was derricks arms around me. I know he loved me, unlike terrence. I snuck downstairs and went through the fridge. Everyone else was in their guest rooms so i could easily sneak downstairs. I grabbed a bottle of vodka and chugged it. I needed this. I finished that and drunk a whole bottle of hennesy...i started hearing the voice again.

"How's my bad girl doing? I know you miss me..ready to come see me?"

"Yes daddy i am...take me." i said outloud and started laughing hysterically. Jussie came downstairs and saw me. "Taraji! What are you doing? Who are you talking to?" he asked me running towards me. I ignored him and smiled at him devilishly. I gulped down some patrone. I was completely drunk and happy. I picked up an empty bottle. "Taraji...you drunk three bottles of this stuff and didn't eat anything? Why would you do this?" he asked me grabbing for the bottle. I tore my hand away and started laughing. "Here let me help you back upstairs.." he said grabbing my hand. "Let me go. I can walk." i said tearing my hand away. I started walking and swaying. I took 5 steps and fell to the ground face first, breaking the bottle in my hand. I hit the floor so hard that it woke up everyone else in the house. "Taraji!" jussie shouted running to me. Everyone came running downstairs and terrence was first. "Taraji! What happened? What the hell? You've been drinking? 3 bottles!" he shouted. I turned over and my nose was bleeding. I sat up and looked around. I looked at my hand and it was bleeding from the pieces of shattered glass in them. I looked at my hand blankly. I remember bleeding when derrick was hitting me and stabbed me. "It's beautiful.." i said quietly. "Hm? This is beautiful?" asked terrence grabbing my hand. I nodded and smiled. "Oh no...you've lost it baby.." said terrence sighing. I started laughing and smiling to myself. "I'm happy now..." i said looking at him. He just grabbed my face gently bringing it to his. I was forced to look into his eyes even though i tried to turn my face away. "Wake up...just wake up....get him out of your head..you've forgotten what real love is like. It's like something just snapped inside of you that's causing you to act like this. You're brainwashed to think he loves you. He's in your thoughts whispering to you...telling you to do these things that you would never do. Just wakeup...come back to me..." he said to me. I felt my pupils dilate. I grabbed his face with my other hand. We stared into eachothers eyes. I looked at his lips and back up to his eyes. I backed away and stood up quickly. Everyone stared at me. Jussie gently grabbed my hand and wrapped it up. I took my hands out if his grip quickly when he was done and i started seeing the room spin again. "Taraji?.." asked breyshere shaking me. I looked at him blankly for about 5 seconds before i threw up on the floor. It stopped then it would start again, more and more each time. It was so much that it hurt..

Terrence POV

Taraji was throwing up all over the floor and i was worried. It started out brown and normal but changed into a darkish purple fluid. I was scared and surprised. It smelled sort of...soda-ish...like sprite. My eyes widened and my heart nearly stopped. Taraji has been drinking lean...

"Baby!..you've been drinking lean?!" i shouted asking her as she vomited. "I haven't been drinking SHIT!" she shouted as she was interrupted by another gallon of vomit pouring out of her mouth. "Oh my god..." i said constantly as i paced in circles. She's never done drugs before...she thinks that it's absolutely wrong to be doing. More of the purple ooze came out of her mouth non-stop, how of this stuff did she drink? "Baby how many cups of lean did you drink?" i asked her. She stopped vomiting and looked up at me blankly. "Taraji.." i said seriously. "....8...." she whispered quietly. Everyone gasped. "You could've killed yourself.." said trai. "I know..." taraji said smiling to herself. He sighed and we all hugged her. She squirmed around and got out of our grip throwing up again. Jussie took her into the bathroom to clean her up and i laid down face first on a couch. I had alot running through my mind with this woman. She was sitting up poisoning her self for the satisfaction of a dead woman abuser. She's grown to him. I thought i was enough but something just...snapped in her. Things just keep getting worse...what happened to the positivity in life? I heard cookie constantly puking her guts out in the bathroom and i grimaced. It's such a shame what's going on with her. "Taraji if you feel better later on maybe you could go to the grocery store with me?" asked jussie to taraji. She just looked up at him as if she was confused on what he said. "Why are you helping me?" she asked him. "Because we love you.." jussie said seriously as taraji vomited some more. She looked up at him eyeing him from head to toe slowly. He smiled at her but she quickly looked away. He frowned. "So..will you go?" he asked her. She didn't look at him and she shook her head. "Why not?" he asked. I was worried he was pushing her a bit far. She got up quickly wiping her mouth walking out of the bathroom and stomping upstairs...

Taraji POV

I ran into the bedroom and cried. I wasn't feeling right. I felt different...like my heart knew that what I'm doing is wrong but my mind refuses. That's a hard battle to win. All these hallucinations seem to be getting worse and more vivid. They were overcoming me everytime they happened.

"Aww is my baby scared? Come with derrick and I'll protect you my beautiful woman"

There it goes. Another voice. I started hearing more of them. It's like they we're yelling and they wouldn't stop. I started screaming hysterically. "Leave me alone!" i shouted. Although he wasn't there, he was in my head. I cried louder. Terrence came running into the room. "Taraji!" he shouted running towards me. "Stop it! Leave me alone! You don't love me!" i shouted with my eyes closed. "I do love you!" he shouted at me grabbing my arms making me face him. "No! No! No!" i shouted constantly. I kept trying to fight out of his grip but he was a bit stronger than me. "Why are you letting thoughts of him get into your head?!" he shouted at me. I ignored him breaking out of his grip and pushing him on the bed..It's payback time for all those years of not loving me. I brought my face to his. "What are you doing?" Terrence asked me. I ignored him and moved his face to ths side and started kissing his neck. I kissed it a couple times...then...I BIT IT. Hard. Just like derrick did to me. Terrence tossed me off of him onto another side of the bed. "Taraji what the f*ck!" he shouted but then remembered why i did it. "Your picking up on him...doing what he does...your acting just. Like. Him." terrence said disappointed. I put my head down. "I'm being...destroyed.." i said as i started panicking again. Terrence came over and wrapped his arms around me. I didn't even care anymore. I just wanted myself to die. Why is everything so hard on me? Why is everyone against me? Maybe I'm better off going with derrick than being in this terrible place..

(Derricks spirit imaginary form of watching over taraji and whispering things into her ear)

TBC...