Pick Up The Pieces

Sentiment

"Kotetsu,

The air's a lot different here near tea country. I'm not sure whether it's because I'm homesick at all, or if it really is different here. It seems...heavier. Only the slightest bit. I think I'll just boil it down to I miss you. I know it hasn't been that long, but I'm already suffering from separation anxiety from you. Heh, call me love struck I guess.

I'm a little suspicious of these 'gypsies' though...they all seem much too calm. Aren't gypsies supposed to be lively and carefree? Maybe I'm just overreacting, or my gut instincts could be correct. Perhaps that's why I felt like I needed to write this.

To be honest, I'm not sure what I'm meant to be writing. I just felt the sudden urge that this was important. Well, I know that you're the most important thing in my life. You have been since god knows, and I wouldn't change the world for anything if it meant losing you from my life.

Tets, you have always been my soulmate, even before we became an item. I know that everything you've ever done is just to look out for me. Even from the stupid times in the academy together when we were almost kicked out for our mishaps. Gee, they were some fun times though, weren't they?

I think my most fondest memory is how we met. Remember how we both ended up in detention and it was just us two? Heh, my wrist was beginning to sound like a cement mixer after all the lines we had to write out. Boy, the sensei in charge wasn't terribly bright, was he? I can't believe that we used a substitution justu and got away with it. The start of a beautiful friendship.

Y'know, looking over the years now it's been a blessing to be your friend. You're my best friend, and I hope that I'm yours. Well, even if I wasn't, you'd still be mine. You bring out both the best and worse in me Tets. You were the one that taught me how fun life could be. All I had to do is take a few risks.

Remember when we went cliff diving that one winter break? Sheesh, that was terrifying. I can't believe that you pushed me off the cliff! Still, if you hadn't, I wouldn't realise how fun and exhilarating that was; feeling the rush of the wind and then realising that you're in the salty water, living and breathing still...

I think perhaps that may have been the day that I realised I was attracted to you in a way. You looked amazing in the sun, and you've got an impressive set of abs. I have to say, I am a little jealous. I guess you've got a fitting name for the body you possess. Even you yourself used to flaunt around and call yourself 'Konoha's man of steel.' I always laughed, even when no one else did.

I think that's one of the best things I love about you. You make me laugh so easily. I've never met anyone else that can make me smile anything close to what you can. Your best feature is definitely your smile. Please, please don't ever lose it. In a way, it defines you and if something happens to it, I'll be disappointed. I guess I can let you pass with pouting, because well, I think you look the adorable when you do, but, it you lost your smile...I don't know what I'd do. I'd just pray that there was some way you could get it back...

Sheesh, listen to me rambling on. I'm feeling a little bit of a pain in my heart thinking out you, so I am going to conclude this to the fact that I really do miss you. But above all, I absolutely love you Tets. I don't feel like I've said it enough to you, but I do. If...if something happens to me, I want you to know that you get everything; my place, my ryo, my possessions... Absolutely everything. None of these measure up to what you've given me though. You gave me your heart, your trust...even your body.

Speaking of which, I'm surprised that I was your first. I was certain that you'd had at least once partner before... Anyway, tell me when I get back okay? But I guess I owe you an explanation of my actions so many months ago. I...I know it sounds bad to write, but I felt like I did take advantage of you a lot when we first...did "it", but I wanted you to see that this wasn't something you should have been afraid of or disgusted by. If you hadn't wanted to do "it", I know you would have fought me to stop, but you didn't. I guess deep down you knew that it was okay to be with me.

And it is okay Tets. This is something that you do with someone you love. I can't imagine everything that you would have been through beforehand, but I wanted you to understand that it's natural and you should never feel ashamed of who you are or who you love, because love does not choose or favour somebody. It usually strikes at the stupidest times, but when you know it's true love when the feeling doesn't go away, not ever. I know this because I've had to feel it for so many years. I, too, was afraid to tell you. I'm so sorry for not saying anything sooner, if I knew how happy you would have made me.

...There's a lot of things I'd like to ask you, but I'm running out of light and time to write. I also have had to do something terrible.

I've sent back my ring with you. I've had to take it off because a few things had gone missing within our packs and even from us when we sleep. The general consensus is that the gypsies are taking things and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I lost it. So I figure sending it back to you is going to ensure it be in the safest place it can ever be. I apologise if this makes you worry. I understand the connections between them, but I want to come back to it...I want to come back to you. That's all I care about. It's all I ever have.

It still boggles my mind that we're together. When you 'proposed' to me, it all seemed so surreal. Really though, who in this world could ask me to resist. You are my life, my world. I never thought that we would, simply because I do understand what you see in our...predicament. This village is one of prejudice and judgement, but we've made this work. We can change the way that people think, but it will take some work. All I know is that with you by my side, nothing is impossible. I can't wait to see you again.

Before I finish, I want to tell you one more thing.

Kotetesu, you are an incredible shinobi with the world at his fingertips. I want you to hold your head high when we're apart. I want you to look at yourself and feel proud for everything you've become. Wake up feeling proud that you are my everything. I belong to you. Everything about you is beautiful. Handsome yes, but you are beautiful. I get breathless thinking about you. Corny, I know, but it happens.

I love you Kotetsu. I'll see you around.

Iz"