Seven Letter Words #Wattys2016

Part 40

Juliet

We ate dinner at a small Italian restaurant close enough to the hotel to walk. The tables were covered in white linin and the waiter took his time reciting the specials and bringing out each course of our meal. I felt like a kid pretending to be a grown-up and it made joy fill my chest. Being with Liam was fun, which only reminded me that being without him was going to hurt. I pushed aside my fears and promised myself I would make the most of the time we had.

We dipped inside the mall in search of ice cream, and Liam took my hand. It felt natural and easy, like he'd held it a million times already. I tried to remember the way his palm felt against mine and the strength with which he gripped my hand. I'd said goodbye to too many good men and I wasn't looking forward to saying goodbye to him. But what choice did I have? I could either let him go and feel the sting once, or I could try to hang on and be slowly beaten down with every goodbye he'd be forced to say. I just wasn't strong enough to survive that.

"You should go into that store," he suggested, pointing to a small dress shop as we made our way through the mall. There weren't many shoppers since it is so close to closing time, but the store still had the front display lit up, trying to entice the few women wandering around to come inside.

"We probably don't have time," I answered, pulling my phone from my pocket to check. Just thirty minutes until closing.

"There's time." He steered me inside and stopped short at a deep blue dress hanging delicately from a rack near the front. "This one's nice," he smiled shyly, pulling me closer as my reluctant feet waited for an excuse to flee. I wasn't a great shopper. I didn't like to dig through the racks or try on a million things.

"I don't need a dress," I told him.

"I think you might." He let go of my hand and moved behind me. With a soft brush of his hand, he swept my hair over my shoulder and tugged at the collar of my shirt. "Six?" he asked curiously. I nodded my head and he moved to the rack to pull a dress my size and hand it to me.

"I don't want to have to rush home to make prom. It's really not a big deal." But it was a beautiful dress. I held it by the bodice and ran my hand down the long sheer layers that danced along the ground. It started off a light blue, so light it appeared silver and then gradually got darker until it was a shade of blue so deep it almost looked black.

"I'll get you back in time." He smiled and looked into my eyes, urging me to at least try it on. The sales woman approached and offered me a dressing room.

"Fine," I agreed and headed off to the back of the store to the small room with a curtain. I undressed and then put it on and fell in love with it immediately. It was classy and elegant making me feel like a princess as I twirled slowly in front of the mirror.

"Well..." he asked from the other side of the curtain, "Do I get to see it?"

"Maybe," I teased as I slide open the thick fabric and stepped outside.

He didn't say a word. His eyes moved quickly, scanning me from head to toe and just when I thought he's seen enough, he let them trail up again slowly, seeming to take in every inch. His eyes met mine and stay locked for a minute. I know we were supposed to be talking about the dress, but I couldn't help but think he might just have been referring to me when he whispered softly, "Beautiful."

"Thank you. I love it."

"Then get it." He crossed his arms and stood before me with his legs slightly parted. It gave off a wave of authority and I knew he wouldn't take no for an answer. I nodded and stepped back into the small dressing room. Only I didn't get out of the dress right away. I had to sit down. I grabbed my discarded clothing from the small black chair inside and held them on my lap so I could sit. My heart was hurting and my lungs seemed to burn with each breath. I used my shirt to catch a few tears before they fell. What were we doing? Suddenly I felt like Cinderella after the clock struck midnight. I was going to lose my hold on this perfect moment and everything that had turned into something better when Liam showed up was going to start disappearing.

I pulled it together and got dressed; waiting until I knew Liam wouldn't see the evidence of my tears. When I stepped back out, he was waiting for me. "Let me hold the dress." He took it from me and made his way to the front of the store. I followed behind him and watched wordlessly as the sales woman removed the security tag and hung it gently in a garment bag. I reached for my wallet, but Liam shook his head. "I want to get this for you."

"No. I'll buy it myself."

"Juliet, I may not be able to take you to prom, but I can make sure you feel beautiful while you're there." I could practically hear the sales woman swooning, but she just smiled at him and took his debt card.

"Thank you." I didn't have the heart to tell him I didn't want to go. I didn't want to be there with someone else. I didn't want to have to act like everything was perfect and that I was happy to be at some stupid dance when I knew I was going to miss him so painfully the second he left me. I didn't want to go with my ex, and I didn't want to dance with anyone that didn't smell like Liam—and perhaps the most hurtful was that I knew no one would ever hold me the way that he'd held me.

He took the dress from the woman and held his hand out for me to take and I did. I let his fingers thread through mine and I let my lips curl up in a smile even though the pain I was feeling in my heart made it such a big effort. Instead of confessing everything that was weighing so heavily on my shoulders, I tucked it away and took a step towards him. And then I let him kiss my head and pull me closer as I added pretend to my list of seven letter words that I hated.