What a Catch! (Panic! At The Disco fanfiction )

Chapter 17- It was Always You

When the world gets too heavy put it on my back

I saw his eyes fall shut, his chest rise and fall beneath waves of oxygen.

I'll be your levy, you are taking me apart like bad glue on a get well card.

I ran my fingers along his cheek bones, gazing around the room for a second. He was more loved than he gave himself credit for. Merely a few weeks had passed since he was admitted into hospital, yet he had accumulated a collection of almost 1000 cards from fans and countless tweets online.

It was always you, falling for me. Now theres always time calling for me.

I'd been so foolish to let Ryan go. To have been such a jerk to him all those years ago. We could have been together, married, adopted children. In love. Perhaps it was my fault that he was this way. Perhaps I could have saved him. But I was too selfcentred, always leaving him to chase me.

Im the light, blinking at the end of the road, blink back to let me know...

Why hadn't I given him a sign sooner that I was in love with him? Instead of leaving it to the very last minute? My fate had already been decided now. This deed may hopefully make up for all of my sins.

Im a fly thats trapped in a web, but im thinking that my spiders dead.

There was no escaping this situation. I had to leave Ryan asleep 2 hours before the operation. But as I left him, I continued to sing the song. His song.

Lonely, lonely little life, I could kid myself in thinking that Im fine.

They dressed me in a drab dressing gown and lay me on an unnaturally white bed, telling me to relax. I took a pen and paper and began to write a note. Much like a suicide note. Only with a clear, dead set reason for doing this. And purpose. There was a 33% chance that I would survive the operation. And a 20% chance of surviving the recovery. That's why it was legal.

It was always you falling for me. Now there's always time calling for me.

They wheeled me into the same room as Ryan before the anesthetic. He lay, puffy eyed and sobbing beside me.

"Brendon you're such an idiot foe doing this!" He cried, wiping his eyes furiously, "Do you know how much I hate you right now?"

"Ry, calm down. I'll be okay. I love you..." I sighed, blanking put anything he just said.

"I love you too, moron." A strangled chuckle left his throat before they placed a simple injection in his arm.

Im the light blinking at the and of the road, blink back to let me know...

The anesthetic was warm and fuzzy, bright and colourful lights engulfing me. It was peaceful.

That Im skin and bone, just a cane and rusty throne.

Never before had I felt so at rest, though I had been anesthetized many times before. That's when it struck me. This may be the final rest. The eternal struggle may be over.

The castle's under siege But the sign outside says leave me alone.

I had fought my battle. I had fulfilled my purpose. I had done well. Though being a famous rockstar proves nothing for me. Ryan had done. Ryan had completed me as I had completed him. Id meet with him again some day. A moonlit night beneath the sun, simply proving that anything was possible. In a land of broken dreams

It was always you falling for me

Now there's always time calling for me

Im the light blinking at the end of the road

Blink back to let me know

It was always you

Blink back to let me know

It was always you....