Daddy S.M

| Losing Her |

        I drove to Laurence's house, I couldn't bare to see Edwina's face. Not now. I need time.. Time to think about what just fucking happened. I pulled up into his driveway, Laurence is a good friend of Edwina's. He'll trust me.

"Hey."

I awkwardly rub the back of my neck. Laurence looks like shit, his bags are dark and his hair is a mess. What the hell happened to this guy?

"Could I come in?"

"Yeah whatever, where's Edwina?"

I bow my head lowly, tears welling my eyes.

"Can we just put her aside for now?"

I choke out. Laurence is a bit taken back seeing me in tears, he moves out of the doorway, letting me in. I sniffle, entering his home, and finding his living room.

"I need to talk to you.."

I drift off. Laurence takes a seat across from me, he shrugs, letting me continue.

"I never intended to do this, nor did I ever wanna hurt, Edwina. Katie just came at me, and I regret ever driving to her house."

Laurence raises his eyebrows, sitting up from his seat slowly.

"What. Did. You. Do?"

I shake my head in frustration, Edwina. The love of my life. Fuck. I run my fingers through my hair, roughly tugging at the ends.

"I went to Katie's house to comfort her over her aunts loss, and instead she kissed me. I pushed her off the second she was on top of me. It made me sick. I really fucking regret coming to help her because I knew she'd do something like that. I knew she'd jeopardize the only relationship that I actually care about. I knew she'd make me fuck up, and lose the one thing I care about.

I love Edwina.. So, so much. And I don't wanna have the feeling of letting her go. To see her heartbroken? I can't. I can't fucking endure that. I love her too much to see her go through that kind of pain.

Yes, she's my submissive, but she means more to me than just that. It always felt like it was more than just sex. She made me feel, she made me swoon, she made me love. She made me love her, and that will be the one thing I'll never regret.. I need her to forgive me."

I have tears streaming down my face, my hands were trembling. I'm so afraid of losing her.. I can't bare the thought of her in someone else's arms. And I can't bare the thought of me sleeping with anyone but Edwina. I love her, more than anything.          

Laurence is wide eyed, silence dawns upon us both. Just my sniffling, and sobs filling the tensioned room. I hold my hands in front of my eyes, thinking. I hear his footsteps come beside me, he bends down and meets me eye to eye.

"She'll forgive you."

"How would you know?"

"Because the person I love told me that exact same story recently, and I forgave her. It hurt me, fuck man, it killed me inside. But I knew that losing her would be worse than the arguments and the mistakes. I trust her enough to know she's telling the truth. And me knowing Edwina since middle school.. She talks about you like you're her world. You both are so in love."

He chuckles.

Really?

"Really?"

"Yeah, don't ever give up on the person you love. No matter how hard the debacle could be."

"Thanks man, truly."

"No problem, we've all had our ups and downs. I know you didn't kiss her."

"How?"

"The way you talk about Edwina.. If you didn't love her enough, you wouldn't even bring up her name. You would have just defended yourself, and not care about what she'd feel. What you feel for her is real."

I sigh, the guy has a point.

"I'm gonna talk to her."

"Good Luck Shawn, I'll talk to her after so she can blow off some steam."

I nod my head.

"Thanks for the precaution measures."

And with that I leave his house, to my own.