Cross My Heart And Hope To Die (~Please Be My Saviours Sequel~)

Never Mind, I Still Feel Like Shit..

~ Tony's POV ~

Aly went upstairs, nobody knows why, but we guessed she needed time alone..

We were all wrong.

"Tony!"

I didn't have time to think, I jumped off the couch letting my phone fall on the ground.

I climbed the stairs skipping some stairs making me almost fall.

I eventually heard the other boys follow behind.

I finally arrived in Aly's room and looked around as I found her laying down in the bathroom. Unconscious. I ran to her and picked her up.

Blood.

My whole body shook. My bones cracked from the inside. My only question..

Why?
But I eventually answered it on my own as Mike took Aly out of my arms.

Joshua Ramsay.

I looked at Vic as I mouthed Josh's name as he nodded sadly. I ran downstairs and grabbed my phone.

~ Aly's POV ~

"W-what the f-fuck do we do?" I heard sobs as I was rocked back and forth.

"Calm down, calm down" I heard another voice say as doors were opened and something was dropped down on the floor making me flinch.

"Aly?-" the person holding me said as he squeezed me tighter "you wanna make me die from a heart attack again?" I heard sobs coming out of his voice.. Mike

"So-sorry.." I heard him chuckle sadly as I felt a kiss being placed on my forehead.
"Holy shit.. There's a hole in her arm." I hear Jaime's annoying ass voice say, I'm sorry Jaime I love you.. But this is not the time to make remarks.. and then- everybody gasped.

Boxes were opened as I heard one word being mumbled but heard by Vic's mouth "stitches"

"No!" I screamed as I tried to get out of Mike's arms, but he just placed me down on the hard ground and putted his hands in my hands as he pinned me down, "Jaime don't just stay there help me bro!" I heard a gasp as Jaime pinned down my legs.

I Finally was able to open my eyes to the light, I felt horrible. Never mind, I still feel like shit.
Josh. Where's Josh. I need Josh..
But I left him.

"Mmkay.. Doll face. This is-uh probably gonna hurt like shit" I looked at Vic as he wiped off my tears, I felt a sting on my arm.. He was disinfecting my arm.. Who had a hole, I bit my tongue cursing my life in my head. The pain was unbearable, like if someone was stabbing me more than one time, but I had to deal with it, it was the price I had to pay to try to take away my own life.. And failing, again.. But miserably.

And then I felt Mike put his head in my neck. He couldn't watch it. He already lived it once, and he couldn't stand it. And Vic who used to self-harm a lot is used to This.. Ugly truth in front of him.

I felt the needle inside my arm.. Going up and down as I just started to cry out of pain.

You know sewing needles. Yes. This.. In my arms

He kept moving the needle out my arm and in-

Until

"Mmkay guys I called and-" Tony said as he came in the bathroom, and looked at the scene in front of him, when he finally figured out what Vic was doing he made a gulping sound.. "Ughh-" he putted his hand on his heart as turned around and found a garbage and puked his guts out..

Poor turtle.. A sweet innocent boy who I almost promised not to do this mistake and I just broke this almost promise.

I felt bad breaking him like this. Watching him puke from seeing all the blood as I heard a sob come out of Tony's mouth..

I mumbled sorry as Mike shook his head still in my neck. "Stay here.. Stay alive.. Stay with us.. Stay with me.. Don't leave.. We need you as much as you need us.." I head Mike sob as I felt my shirt getting wet from the tears. Tears streamed down my face as I bit my lips.

"Done.." Vic said stuttering as Mike grabbed me in his arms and sat me on the bed.

They all looked at me as I started to cry.

Mike couldn't say anything, his mouth was shut, like if he had lost his voice...

Tony was still over the garbage.. He couldn't look at me, I broke one of my best friend apart, the thought of him never talking to me again made me cry more..

Jaime was curled in a corner of the wall shaking like if had just fallen into the water of the north.. Antartica- and whispering words to himself.. Like if he was singing to himself to calm down..

And Vic was still in the bathroom looking for something.. Acting totally normal around me.. Knowing that was a normal phase for me..

But I hate myself more than anything

And then Josh.. My world, my life, my heart, my breathing, my existence, my reason to live, the person who makes my heart beat faster every time I see him.. The person I loved more than my whole life..

"I can't live without him!" I sobbed and cried and screamed and they all sat down beside me and hugged me, rubbed my back and played with my hair to calm me down.. as Vic wrapped my arm in a bandage..

"You can't?" Tony whispered close to my ear after a few minutes.. as I shook my head.

"I- don't hate me.. He's-uh coming.." I looked at Tony with terrified eyes.

I wanted to thank him, for bringing back the love of my life, but I just started to cry more..

***

~ Josh's POV ~

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I fucked up again.

I quickly cancelled half the shows and grabbed the nearest plane to San Diego.

I quickly texted the fans on the mtrench account

"Hey guys, Josh here.

Sorry I had to cancel half of the shows last minute. I got an emergency call from home, mostly Aly, I have no idea what's going on, but I'll be back soon.

Lots of love xx"

Actually I knew what was going on..

Tony told me.

Aly.

Why did she try to kill herself again..

Porcelain.. Hang on baby.