Mirage (A Chris Brown Story)

Chapter Fifteen.

If my life were to be some cheesy ass romance novel I would most likely pounce off of the bed and blindly run after Chris, only to stop him and tell him, with tears streaming down my face, that I love him deeply and that I have trust problem and push away anyone that cares, and then he would proclaim that he loves me and that he would be there every step of the way as I learned to love again. But my life isn't a damn novel, so when Chris stormed out of the room all I did was sit there.

*°*°

Not all days were bad. I remember the spark that ignited in my father's eyes when he first laid eyes on MiMi. He was so happy, it was already decided that her middle name would be Shyanne, but upon seeing her my father decided that Hope was better suited. So there it was, A'Miyah Hope Martinez. Baby Girl was like an angel in hell, she changed things.

When my father was around her he was a less violent and overall happier man. He loved her innocence and I knew that he couldn't do to her what he did to me because he would never forgive himself if he did, it would kill him inside.

When she was born I probably should've been jealous because of the love my father showed for her but could never show for me, but I wasn't, Baby Girl's very existence gave my mother and I hope. Hope that my father could change. Hope that things would be different. But you can only live on hope for so long before reality catches up with you, and man did it fucking catch up with us.

*°*°

I am awaken by a loud banging noise coming from a few feet away from me. A scream erupts from my body as I see a large shadow of a man walking my way, coming from the window.

A hand covers my mouth. "Hush Ari, it's just me!" a familiar voice exclaims.

My eyes refocus and I notice that it is Chris who is snuggling into bed next to me.

"Chris what the hell are you doing?"I asked him, slapping his clammy hand off of my mouth. Speaking of clammy since when are Chris' hands ever clammy?

"Look Arielle I really just want to go to sleep," he slurs out, his voice deeper than usual.

I reach over and flick on the lamp on the nightstand on my side of the bed.

"Ahh turn the damn light off!" he tells me, snaking his toned arms around my waist causing my heart to speed up.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I yelp, batting his arms away from my body.

His thumb starts drawing patterns on my slightly exposed skin. "Why are you being like that?" he whispers in my ear, his warm breathe fanning over my face.

What the actual fuck. I squirm under his grip, trying to turn around so that I can talk to him face to face, but his hold on me is pretty firm. Deciding it it might be better to try another approach I stretch my arm behind me and pinch the first thing I touch, which happens to be his very toned chest. Under my touch he wiggles and makes a choking sound which some might call a giggle.

Who knew that the almighty Chris was ticklish? If the situation was different I probably would of laughed my ass off, but instead I use his weakness to my advantage and tickle him again. As he wiggles and squirms his hold on me loosen so I turn and face him. What I see causes my blood to boil.

"Are you high?" I yell, glaring into his bloodshot eyes.

His eyes widen, "No."

But I can tell that he is lying because the left side of his mouth twitched.

"Chris, what the hell?" I ask, raising an accusing eyebrow at him.

"Don't look at me like that!" he snaps, anger shining through his eyes.

"Like what?" I snap back.

"You know what, you think I'm some spoiled sheltered nigga but I'm not," never would I have thought I'd see Chris this furious, "everything I have, everything my family has, I've worked my ass off for! I've done some shit that I'm not exactly proud of, but at the end of the day a man has to do what he fucking has to do for his family. So there it is. My father, if you can call him that, was a coward. He left my family for his 'other family' the whole damn time that he was with my mama he had a chick on the side, he was telling her he loved her but meanwhile he was stashing money on the side to give to his little bitch and-"

I lightly place my hand on his shoulder,"Chris stop."

But he's way too far into it, "-when he finally left us he didn't leave us shit! He packed his shit and walked out of the damn house, didn't say a damn thing to nobody! My mama was so hurt. The thing is, I didn't even know how deep she was til I came back from a drop off I had to do and found her OD-ed on her bathroom floor."

At this point he lowers his voice, "So I got out of the streets and Erica moved back home so that we could help mama get back on track. Now look at us. So next time you want to think that everything was just handed to me on a silver platter and that life is just all fine and dandy, think again."

Silence. That is all that surrounds us as I process what he just confessed. He's right, from the start I judged him and thought that I knew everything about him when I didn't even know his damn story! Sometimes being an asshole feels like shit.

"I'm sorry."

A bitter laugh erupts out of his mouth, "You see I thought that you out of all people would understand what it feels like to not want other people's damn sympathy! I never understood why peopled apologized for shit that they didn't, and never would, fucking understand."

I answer him with a bitter laugh of my own, "And I thought that you out of all people would understand that I'm not apologizing for your damn fucked up life. I'm apologizing because I assumed things about you that I shouldn't have and I'm sorry."

It takes another moment of silence, but I watch as his eyes soften, as well as his facial expression.

"Thank you."

I nod back, swiftly.

"Alright, well I'm tired so let's just go to sleep," he sighs, a lazy smile appearing onto his face as he snuggles into his plush pillow.

I turn to my other side and fluff the pillow that is under my head, "Goodnight Chris."

***

A contempt smile takes over my lips as I hear the man next to me loudly snoring, and I feel the barrier that I had safely wrapped around my heart begin to crack.

*****

I'm updating this early because today is a special day. It is me and my best friend's Friend-a-versary and she's always forcing me to update so I did it just for her! Haha

I hope you guys liked this chapter, I realize that some stuff is kind of up in the air but that was my intention because shit will be hitting the fan very very soon! So be prepared!

I also realize that Arielle is kind of a bi-polar bitch....that isn't going to change anytime soon! Lol!

I'm going to need fifteen votes and fifteen comments (from different people) for the next chapter!

(P.S please give me some good feedback)

(P.P.S don't be lazy. If you can vote then you might as well drop me a comment!)

(P.P.P.S I love you my lovelies! ♡)